The Province of Laguna is a gargantuan, efficient nation, renowned for its compulsory military service, restrictive gun laws, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 12.847 billion Lagunans are free to succeed or fail in life on their own merits; the successful tend to enjoy an opulent (but moralistic) lifestyle, while the failures can be seen crowding out most jails.

The relatively small, moralistic government is primarily concerned with Spirituality, although Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Welfare and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Santa Cruz. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 9.6%.

The very strong Lagunan economy, worth 763 trillion pesos a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Furniture Restoration, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 59,399 pesos, with the richest citizens earning 9.9 times as much as the poorest.

The mining industry is making inroads into environmentally sensitive areas, Laguna has designated Santa Cruz as its capital city, Leader has just been declared ruler of Laguna in an international press conference, and a major religion has been named as Laguna's national religion. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Laguna's national animal is the tilapia, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Laguna is ranked 110,532^nd in the world and 6^th in The Philippines for Most Patriotic, with 14.08 flags saluted per person per day.