The Kingdom of Laconia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, renowned for its compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 27.277 billion Laconians are free to succeed or fail in life on their own merits; the successful tend to enjoy an opulent (but moralistic) lifestyle, while the failures can be seen crowding out most jails.

The large, moralistic, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Law & Order, and Industry. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 35.3%.

The thriving Laconic economy, worth a remarkable 1,212 trillion drachmas a year, is quite specialized and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with major contributions from Pizza Delivery, Arms Manufacturing, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is 44,455 drachmas, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 135,802 per year while the poor average 11,279, a ratio of 12.0 to 1.

Voting is compulsory, punitive tariffs protect local industry, and the government is seen to favor Catholics. Crime is moderate, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Laconia's national animal is the dragon.

Laconia is ranked 66,706^th in the world and 8^th in Attica for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 50.99 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.