The State of Knockaird is a gargantuan, orderly nation, remarkable for its restrictive gun laws and stringent health and safety legislation. The cynical, devout population of 15.757 billion Knockairdians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Spirituality, although Defense, Healthcare, and Welfare are also considered important, while International Aid and Industry are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Westminster. The average income tax rate is 26.2%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but stagnant Knockairdian economy, worth 49.8 trillion betales a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Pizza Delivery, and Retail. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 3,162 betales, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Citizens are enjoying a recent large cut in taxes, citizens are barcoded to keep track of their movements, breastfeeding mothers are replacing smokers to loiter outside the workplace, and Knockaird has designated Westminster as its capital city. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Knockaird's national animal is the deer, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Knockaird is ranked 274,520^th in the world and 583^rd in Ancient Lands for Highest Poor Incomes, with 3,162.67 Standard Monetary Units.