The Republic of Guardian is a huge, orderly nation, renowned for its punitive income tax rates, restrictive gun laws, and stringent health and safety legislation. The cynical population of 952 million Guardianians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 50.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but stagnant Guardianian economy, worth 8.23 trillion rubledollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient black market in Cheese Exports, Pizza Delivery, Information Technology, and Soda Sales. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 8,643 rubledollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Guardian's national animal is the hawk.

Guardian is ranked 227,775^th in the world and 6,776^th in Suspicious for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 200.68 on the Gilded Widget Scale.