The United Anarchist States of Coludistan is a huge, efficient nation, ruled by Jay Cranston with an even hand, and renowned for its frequent executions, keen interest in outer space, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, devout population of 877 million Coludistanians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hanieview. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 26.7%.

The powerhouse Coludistanian economy, worth 74.9 trillion Ices a year, is fairly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Basket Weaving. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 85,351 Ices, with the richest citizens earning 8.1 times as much as the poorest.

Hanieview's main city thoroughfare has been blocked by a row of leyland cypresses that mysteriously appeared overnight, claiming to have performed the Heimlich Maneuver is a popular defense for assault charges, interviewees for teaching jobs are waterboarded to "reveal undesirable histories", and pallbearers at military funerals dive for cover when they hear the three-volley salute. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Coludistan's national animal is the Ferrari, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Coludistan is ranked 192,349^th in the world and 239^th in Wintreath for Highest Food Quality, scoring 12.47 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.