The Holy Empire of Cardmania90091 is a gargantuan, efficient nation, renowned for its infamous sell-swords, compulsory military service, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 10.984 billion Cardmania90091ians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Administration, and Defense. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 69.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Cardmania90091ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,956 trillion Euros a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 178,109 Euros, with the richest citizens earning 8.5 times as much as the poorest.

School lunches are made with hypo-allergenic wood pulp, retiring citizens are dragged away in the middle of the night by mysterious men in black suits, welfare recipients are milking the government for all they've got, and ill and injured visitors in Cardmania90091 have to walk it off until they return home. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cardmania90091's national animal is the Giraffe, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Cardmania90091 is ranked 269,095^th in the world and 174^th in Lily for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -9.49 on the Clooney Contribution Index.