The Principality of Caalembel is a colossal, orderly nation, notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 7.855 billion Caalembelians are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, pro-business, well-organized government prioritizes Spirituality, with Law & Order, Healthcare, and Defense also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Environment aren't funded at all. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 6.5%.

The very strong Caalembelian economy, worth 579 trillion patiences a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Basket Weaving industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 73,771 patiences, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 231,704 per year while the poor average 17,984, a ratio of 12.9 to 1.

Scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes and the country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Caalembel's national animal is the Demon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Caalembel is ranked 247,920^th in the world and 190^th in ainulindale for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring zero on the Gilded Widget Scale.