The Theocratic Republic of Tylastrona is a mammoth, genial nation, remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, national health service, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate population of 7.549 billion Helladians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Smyrnaphos. The average income tax rate is 92.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Tylastronan economy, worth 686 trillion Dracmas a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Basket Weaving, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 90,818 Dracmas, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Riots have broken out as a water shortage threatens Tylastrona's stability, residents are readily ratting out rats in restaurants, the richest individuals apparently buy nothing but noodles and toilet paper, and the government is on the side of working people (like CEOs, bankers and billionaires). Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tylastrona's national animal is the Little owl, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Hellenic Polytheism.

Tylastrona is ranked 8,738^th in the world and 9^th in Esportiva for Longest Average Lifespans, with 91.84 years.