The Federation of Scientificum is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Neon Geoglowitius with an iron fist, and notable for its ban on automobiles, smutty television, and pith helmet sales. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical, cheerful population of 27.57 billion Scientists are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The medium-sized, corrupt, pro-business, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lilaholm. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Scientist economy, worth an astonishing 19,459 trillion Kronor a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Average income is a breathtaking 705,817 Kronor, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 3,026,871 per year while the poor average 105,345, a ratio of 28.7 to 1.

Juries are mostly made up of wealthy busybodies and ex-convicts, 'A is for Annulment' is a popular children's song, all statues and paintings of dogs are being destroyed to avoid offending cat-lovers, and earthquake sirens are a leading cause of hearing loss. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Scientificum's national animal is the Nuubly, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Science.

Scientificum is ranked 22,246^th in the world and 1^st in Polandball for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring 6,278.21 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.