The Kronezentralrepublik of Saint Alyssum is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by President Hanne Axmann with a fair hand, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, infamous sell-swords, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 3.142 billion Alyssics live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vectha. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 13.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Alyssic economy, worth 399 trillion Talentwährungs a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 127,007 Talentwährungs, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 426,975 per year while the poor average 28,013, a ratio of 15.2 to 1.

The Vectha Pride Parade's head banner explains how unionizing is heteronormative, military pilots spend more time scraping feathers off their engines than flying their aircraft, several inches are being added to first class seating, and security reviews double as corporate marketing. Crime is totally unknown. Saint Alyssum's national animal is the Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Alyssicism.

Saint Alyssum is ranked 59,395^th in the world and 3^rd in Teremara for Highest Drug Use, scoring 260.59 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.