The Holy Federation of New Fernia is a mammoth, efficient nation, ruled by Jeb Bush with an iron fist, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, zero percent divorce rate, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.736 billion New Fernians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized morass — juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ferncliffe. The average income tax rate is 86.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse New Fernian economy, worth a remarkable 1,005 trillion pounds a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Uranium Mining, Arms Manufacturing, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is an impressive 115,089 pounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Nouveau riche farmers diligently take care of their golden calf herds, foreign livestock are offered asylum, record sales of 'child-whacking sticks' have been reported, and it's best not to ask what goes into Ferncliffe Crispy Fried Tofu's secret blend of herbs and spices. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. New Fernia's national animal is the mountain dragon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Fennism.

New Fernia is ranked 303,886^th in the world and 1,826^th in the Plains of Perdition for Highest Food Quality, scoring 3.49 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.