The New Republic of Neuteutonnia is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Marius Schwantaler with an even hand, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape and compulsory military service. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 2.543 billion Neuteutonnians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small government prioritizes Welfare, although Education, Law & Order, and Defense are also considered important, while Environment is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hafenstadt. The average income tax rate is 16.3%.

The strong Neuteutonnian economy, worth 143 trillion Gelds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Uranium Mining. Average income is 56,400 Gelds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.5 times as much as the poorest.

Photos of picturesque coastal buildings are set against a backdrop of smokestacks and ship hulls, bin lorries have replaced birds as the source of the dawn chorus, invasive species are hunted by the gendarmerie, and after every storm there's an expensive government-funded rainbow. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Neuteutonnia's national animal is the Hunter Eagle, which can occasionally be seen dodging aircraft in the nation's cities, and its national religion is Teutonnium Christianity.

Neuteutonnia is ranked 309,877^th in the world and 15^th in Kali Yuga for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring -8.58 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.