by Max Barry

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Rudest Citizens: 118thHighest Crime Rates: 173rdMost Armed: 179th
The A of the B of the C of the D of
Corporate Bordello
Don't mess with us, and we won't mess with you, friend.
T'korov Eyeketrau
Civil Rights
Very Good
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population7.332 billion

CapitalWt'kroiya Turayi
LeaderT'korov Eyeketrau
FaithReformed Christianity


The A of the B of the C of the D of Zjaum is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by T'korov Eyeketrau with a fair hand, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, free-roaming dinosaurs, and infamous sell-swords. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless, devout population of 7.332 billion R'Koo-oi are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Industry, although Administration and Education are also considered important, while Environment and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wt'kroiya Turayi. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Wrau-yi economy, worth a remarkable 2,264 trillion wyis a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Soda Sales, and Gambling. Average income is an amazing 308,832 wyis, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,411,908 per year while the poor average 41,143, a ratio of 34.3 to 1.

Posing for pictures is an integral part of military training, financial investors are noting a boom in artillery, kitchen patrol is dominated by ten-year-old runts, and people who have never eaten chicken are told it tastes a bit like crocodile. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Zjaum's national animal is the woiwi, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Reformed Christianity.

Zjaum is ranked 172,700th in the world and 103rd in The League of Conservative Nations for Most Ignorant Citizens, with 0.75 Missed References Per Hour.

Rudest Citizens: 118thHighest Crime Rates: 173rdMost Armed: 179thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 206thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 218thFattest Citizens: 239thLargest Retail Industry: 243rdLowest Overall Tax Burden: 262ndMost Avoided: 442ndLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 570thHighest Disposable Incomes: 587thLargest Gambling Industry: 646thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 728thLargest Insurance Industry: 974thMost Rebellious Youth: 1,115thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1,248thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,272ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,287thLargest Mining Sector: 1,544thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,713thHighest Average Incomes: 1,729thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 1,740thTop
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2,153rdLargest Information Technology Sector: 2,336thMost Devout: 2,430thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 3,178thLargest Agricultural Sector: 4,568thMost Corrupt Governments: 4,583rdHighest Economic Output: 5,944thMost Influential: 6,167thMost Efficient Economies: 6,254thSmartest Citizens: 6,590thLargest Publishing Industry: 7,407thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 8,894thTop
Largest Manufacturing Sector: 10,018thHighest Drug Use: 10,598thMost Pro-Market: 11,566thMost Valuable International Artwork: 12,605thLargest Black Market: 14,214thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 14,519th
Most Scientifically Advanced: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionTop
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 2nd in the regionFattest Citizens: 2nd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Armed: 2nd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3rd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 3rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 3rd in the regionHighest Drug Use: 3rd in the regionMost Avoided: 3rd in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 3rd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 3rd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 4th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 4th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 4th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 4th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 4th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 4th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 5th in the regionTop
Highest Economic Output: 7th in the regionMost Politically Free: 7th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 7th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 8th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 8th in the regionMost Devout: 10th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 10th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 10th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, people who have never eaten chicken are told it tastes a bit like crocodile.
  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, kitchen patrol is dominated by ten-year-old runts.
  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, financial investors are noting a boom in artillery.
  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, posing for pictures is an integral part of military training.
  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, constipated-looking politicians are uptight about potty mouths.
  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, most foreigners can't name the leader of Zjaum.
  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, baiting is a national sport.
  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, ships no longer sail as no one wants to encounter Wrau-yi pirates.
  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, royal mothers accustomed to baby-talk assure the troops "we gweatly wespect your service; yes, we do".
  • : Following new legislation in Zjaum, behind every local dictator is a Wrau-yi advisor whispering in their ear.


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 7 » Caezar, Neo Polisophos, Andrewzland, Dykurst, Amaan land, LDS Church, and Greater Sacramento.

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