The Awesomeness of The united states of phil is a gargantuan, efficient nation, remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, frequent executions, and ritual sacrifices. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 10.375 billion united states of philians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Philtopia. The average income tax rate is 52.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient united states of philian economy, worth 877 trillion golds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 84,609 golds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Citizens live in superstitious fear of the mysterious glowing clouds that float over The united states of phil, scientists are not permitted to ask questions, a bill to outlaw math homework has been submitted, and pristine wilderness has been trashed in the quest for cheaper oil. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The united states of phil's national animal is the dog, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

The united states of phil is ranked 75,703^rd in the world and 1^st in Pebble of Peeble for Lowest Crime Rates, with 69.19 law-abiding acts per hour.