The Colony of Shabby Pigeon is a gargantuan, efficient nation, renowned for its prohibition of alcohol, strictly enforced bedtime, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 13.252 billion Shabby Pigeons are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Defense, and Education. The average income tax rate is 58.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Shabby economy, worth a remarkable 1,346 trillion crusts a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Retail, Gambling, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 101,629 crusts, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Shivering secretaries type letters under torrential downpours in open-roof offices, gigantic new prisons are springing up all over the nation, incompetent former soldiers have been re-employed as incompetent cleaners and kitchen staff, and politicians are often seen with soldiers pointing guns at their heads. Crime, especially youth-related, is well under control, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Shabby Pigeon's national animal is the pigeon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Shabby Pigeon is ranked 171,827^th in the world and 51^st in Philippines for Lowest Crime Rates, with 59.14 law-abiding acts per hour.