The Bländ Reichslander of Lemsrow is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Sir Funko Sverjas P Querra VII with an even hand, and remarkable for its complete lack of prisons, state-planned economy, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 5.198 billion Lemsrownians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Larshavink. The average income tax rate is 98.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Lemsrowian economy, worth a remarkable 1,241 trillion Pecratian Illocos a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an amazing 238,932 Pecratian Illocos, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Octogenarian swimsuit models insist that they've still got it, Sir Funko Sverjas P Querra VII's handshakes with opposition leaders usually lead to thumb wars, Lemsrow's children are widely acknowledged as the most foul-mouthed in the region, and a primitive society is being eroded as its youth flock to the modern world. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lemsrow's national animal is the Zagreb-Manila-Fort Bald Kosmo Dragoneer, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Galactianism.

Lemsrow is ranked 307,243^rd in the world and 8,956^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -606.67 on the Scary Big Number Scale.