The Democratic Republic of Keldea is a massive, orderly nation, renowned for its infamous sell-swords, irreverence towards religion, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 1.564 billion Keldeans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. The average income tax rate is 78.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Keldean economy, worth 238 trillion Loyalty Credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 152,459 Loyalty Credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Military minds worry that 'the blue screen of death' on brand new operating systems may be a literal description, the regional delicacy of chocolate bombes is deadlier than an unexploded bomb, war criminals are given full state funerals, and power to the people comes from the barrel of a gun. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Keldea's national animal is the Sovietrig, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Keldea is ranked 273,206^th in the world and 977^th in The Frontier Sea for Most Cultured, scoring 59 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.