The Democratic States of Ionicurus is a massive, efficient nation, remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, ubiquitous missile silos, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 2.407 billion Ionicurusians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, although Industry, Education, and Healthcare are also considered important, while International Aid and Spirituality receive no funds. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 43.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Ionicurusian economy, worth 446 trillion rubles a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 185,134 rubles, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,204,815 per year while the poor average 11,298, a ratio of 106 to 1.

Indigenous tribal elders can be recognised by their designer watches and expensive suits, landless farmers wander forlornly in the government's many national parks, liberals and conservatives try to disqualify each other's candidates on the grounds that "their ideas would never work in the real world", and Leader's peyote-induced "let's all just be friends" speech is trending world-wide. Crime is a serious problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Ionicurus's national animal is the leopard, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Ionicurus is ranked 11,416^th in the world and 10^th in Saint Osmund for Longest Average Lifespans, with 91.41 years.