The Colony of First attempt at a puppet state is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its prohibition of alcohol, state-planned economy, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 534 million Aoleirkawkrieze are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 75.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but sluggish Aoleirkawkriese economy, worth 17.8 trillion Kawkris a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Furniture Restoration, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 33,329 Kawkris, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nanny industry has had a boom after maternity leave was recently banned, fashion models are guaranteed to be 100% genuinely as anorexic as they appear on magazine covers, First attempt at a puppet state City University is said to be the modern-day Tower of Babel, and social networking sites have discussion groups devoted to planning terrorist attacks. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. First attempt at a puppet state's national animal is the Magpie, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

First attempt at a puppet state is ranked 241,972^nd in the world and 16^th in Phantom for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring -3.22 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.