The Queendom of Ezpassion is a titanic, orderly nation, ruled by Starya with an iron fist, and renowned for its strictly enforced bedtime, irreverence towards religion, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 11.713 billion Ezpassionians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Healthcare, Administration, and Industry also on the agenda, while Spirituality and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Starynopla. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 30.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Ezpassionian economy, worth a remarkable 1,236 trillion Cruzeiroes a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Arms Manufacturing, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 105,602 Cruzeiroes, with the richest citizens earning 6.8 times as much as the poorest.

Criminals identify as innocent, agreeing to appear on TV is often the best way to access social care, fidgety cubicle workers play with their balls, and five-hundred-twenty-five-thousand-six-hundred revivals is how theatre-goers measure a year. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Ezpassion's national animal is the Snake, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Tenebrism.

Ezpassion is ranked 47,579^th in the world and 23^rd in Equestria for Most Cultured, scoring 72 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.