The Face nommer of Exploding face mites is a titanic, orderly nation, renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, absence of drug laws, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical, humorless, devout population of 11.835 billion mites are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 62.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Exploding face mitesian economy, worth a remarkable 1,477 trillion skins a year, is fairly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 124,863 skins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

People who eat pizza with lactase supplements are arrested by the flavour police, young girls aren't having a ball but they are enjoying themselves, acute politicians deride opposition members for being obtuse, and mining safety laws are often more expensive than what's being mined. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Exploding face mites's national animal is the mite, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Exploding face mites is ranked 281,285^th in the world and 5,191^st in eta for Smartest Citizens, with 16.5 quips per hour.