The Free Land of Crysato is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Leader with a fair hand, and remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 16.227 billion Crysatoans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, socially-minded government prioritizes Education, although Healthcare, Welfare, and Environment are also considered important, while Spirituality and Defense are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Crysato City. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Crysatoan economy, worth a remarkable 4,690 trillion Crysoes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 289,062 Crysoes, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Handling people's data is proving an immersive experience, consumption of cat memes has skyrocketed, excessive wheelchair ramps on government buildings have been compared to theme park attractions, and visitors to Graffiti Warrens National Park are offered a complimentary tetanus vaccination. Crime is totally unknown. Crysato's national animal is the fairy penguin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Crysato is ranked 289,451^st in the world and 1^st in Nothing of importance for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring -25.77 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.