The People's Republic of CaenVar is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Chairman Tao Varian with an iron fist, and renowned for its avowedly heterosexual populace, smutty television, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 7.98 billion CaenVarians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Education, and Administration also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Caen Var City. The average income tax rate is 95.2%.

The frighteningly efficient CaenVarian economy, worth a remarkable 1,903 trillion Caens a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 238,523 Caens, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.5 times as much as the poorest.

Skyscrapers get built in just days, genetic screening weeds out citizens whose legs don't bend easily at the knee, mountain rescuers refer to their new gear as the 'watchamacallits' and 'thingymabobs', and the experimental sculpture "Overtures In Dried Caer Dung" has been declared a national treasure. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. CaenVar's national animal is the Caer, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Taoism Worship of the Chairman.

CaenVar is ranked 80,024^th in the world and 3,610^th in Lazarus for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 359.68 on the Clooney Contribution Index.