The Desolate Wasteland of Kubra is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Leader with an iron fist, and renowned for its closed borders, absence of drug laws, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 32.655 billion Kubrans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The tiny, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry, Administration, and Public Transport also on the agenda, while Environment and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of ijustwanttousetheforum. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 5.8%.

The powerhouse Kubran economy, worth a remarkable 2,376 trillion neetbuxes a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is 72,765 neetbuxes, with the richest citizens earning 5.4 times as much as the poorest.

The inchworm that measured the marigolds is six feet under, the red star of communism has been replaced by the gold star of the McRonald's badge, actively encouraging climate change is helping reduce winter fuel costs, and citizens can't decide whether to be proud or horrified by the country's colonial history. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Kubra's national animal is the thing, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is whydidthishappen.

Kubra is ranked 306,672^nd in the world and 12,156^th in Osiris for Lowest Crime Rates, with 3.37 law-abiding acts per hour.