The Direct Democratic Republic of Koana Islands is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Executive Chancellor Ian Sovijaarvinen with an even hand, and remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, daily referendums, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, democratic population of 25.013 billion Koanians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Omfattandestad. The average income tax rate is 66.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Koana Islandsian economy, worth a remarkable 1,773 trillion Kronors a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Trout Farming, and Pizza Delivery. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 70,907 Kronors, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

Business owners return from long vacations to find their factories have been turned into homeless shelters, prudishness is on the way out, soldiers are equipped with multi-million Kronor battlesuits, and the most common psychiatric diagnosis is to 'stop whining and grow up'. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Koana Islands's national animal is the Ejoiyjeth, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Koana Islands is ranked 204,717^th in the world and 10,821^st in Lazarus for Highest Drug Use, scoring 94.37 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.