The Martyr no cap on god bro of Hermitland is a mammoth, genial nation, ruled by ellie with an iron fist, and remarkable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and suspicion of poets. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 5.92 billion Hermitians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of tiramisuland usa. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 73.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Hermitian economy, worth 747 trillion im poor wtfs a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 126,260 im poor wtfs, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 359,949 per year while the poor average 35,316, a ratio of 10.2 to 1.

Insanely good theatre productions face government censorship, the nation's space program is doxxing the planet, citizens volunteer for tax audits to avoid the 80-page Practical Assessment Survey Tool On Religions, and students are explicitly allowed to write answers on their forearms before exams. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Hermitland's national animal is the Hermit Crab, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is ellieisthebestism.

Hermitland is ranked 41,988^th in the world and 122^nd in the Plains of Perdition for Largest Manufacturing Sector, scoring 22,987.76 on the Gooback-Jerbs Productivity Index.