The Golden Holy Empire of Ephamathia is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Haruto Lee with an iron fist, and remarkable for its otherworldly petting zoo, free-roaming dinosaurs, and zero percent divorce rate. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 10.521 billion Ephamathians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ephama. The average income tax rate is 82.3%.

The all-consuming Ephamathian economy, worth a remarkable 2,635 trillion Penalts a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Gambling. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 250,474 Penalts, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.8 times as much as the poorest.

Would-be crossers of the class divide find the social ladder is well-lubricated, kindergartners' favourite dance move is the stop-drop-and-roll, most foreigners can't name the leader of Ephamathia, and putting a mustache on a banknote is considered defacing a national monument. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ephamathia's national animal is the Dove, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Christianity.

Ephamathia is ranked 7,958^th in the world and 314^th in Balder for Lowest Crime Rates, with 110.74 law-abiding acts per hour.