The Republic of Eitoan is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by Ephriam Shrdlu with a fair hand, and renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, smutty television, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 18.901 billion Eitoans live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government prioritizes Defense, with Industry, Administration, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Environment and Spirituality receive no funds. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 6.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Eitoanian economy, worth a remarkable 3,265 trillion Quadas a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 172,784 Quadas, with the richest citizens earning 5.5 times as much as the poorest.

Genetic research is facing major headwinds, residents are readily ratting out rats in restaurants, people are offered free trials to go to trial, and the government is plagued with uncertainty. Crime is almost non-existent. Eitoan's national animal is the Eitoan Tiger, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is No official religion.

Eitoan is ranked 146,262^nd in the world and 35^th in Greater Dienstad for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 1,094.28 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.