The Multicolored Husbands of Earthly Cossack is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Viktor with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory vegetarianism, infamous sell-swords, and fear of technology. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.906 billion українців are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government stops and the rest of society begins, but it is primarily concerned with Industry, although Law & Order, Administration, and Welfare are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Grand Kyiv City. The average income tax rate is 86.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient українська economy, worth 547 trillion українська гривніs a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, extremely specialized black market in Woodchip Exports and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is an impressive 111,537 українська гривніs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Jaw strain is an increasingly common ailment, boys are forced to pair off for the school disco slow dance as the girls are all staying at home, you're only as old as you feel, and it isn't a secret plot without caviar and foie gras. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Earthly Cossack's national animal is the Dove, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Agnostic Ideals.

Earthly Cossack is ranked 5,766^th in the world and 100^th in the Rejected Realms for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 7,732.24 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.