The ᴄᴇɴꜱᴜꜱ ᴍɪɴɪꜱᴛʀʏ of Vendiagram is a mammoth, orderly nation, ruled by Minister of the Census with an iron fist, and remarkable for its strictly enforced bedtime, flagrant waste-dumping, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.557 billion Vendiagramians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Spirituality, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Circle One. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 32.9%.

The all-consuming Vendiagramian economy, worth 818 trillion Excel Cells a year, is dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is 95,613 Excel Cells, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 728,533 per year while the poor average 3,456, a ratio of 210 to 1.

Police deploy tear-gas on unruly kindergarteners, the navy's new flotilla is gonna be a thrilla, art criticism in Vendiagram is scathingly destructive, and pedestrians are advised to avoid wearing red while crossing the street. Crime is a major problem, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Vendiagram's national animal is the Cell Function, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is XLookup.

Vendiagram is ranked 1,324^th in the world and 1^st in Vendiagram for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 296.83 on the Bus Surprisal Index.