The Kaiserreich of Uniand Mel Islands is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Kaiser Grozsi Leopard Lohenköchen with an iron fist, and renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, keen interest in outer space, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-working, cynical population of 3.223 billion Islandians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Blauhausen Großstadt. The average income tax rate is 70.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Islanders economy, worth 341 trillion Marks a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Tourism. Average income is an impressive 105,904 Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Card collectors duel to the death, bad punctuation has come to a full stop, doctors spend more time writing sick notes than caring for the sick, and years of counter-terrorism planning are foiled by small details. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Uniand Mel Islands's national animal is the Lübener Adler, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Uniand Protestant Faith.

Uniand Mel Islands is ranked 36,883^rd in the world and 2,326^th in Osiris for Lowest Crime Rates, with 79.07 law-abiding acts per hour.