The Discordian Wisdom of The Prophet is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, enforced nudity, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 29.611 billion Prophetians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Church of Eris. The average income tax rate is 83.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Prophetian economy, worth a remarkable 1,565 trillion Golden Apples a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Soda Sales industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Retail. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 52,862 Golden Apples, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Clowns are being rounded up and admitted to mental institutions, prison visits increase substantially during election years, reporters sent to cover suspected UFO visits come back with stories about quilting bees, and the Hanging Gardens account for half of The Church of Eris's water use. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Prophet's national animal is the Siamese cat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Discordianism.

The Prophet is ranked 59,619^th in the world and 1^st in The Church of Eris for Longest Average Lifespans, with 81 years.