The Great Socialist Jamahiriya of The Great Lake States is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Brotherly Guide of The Revolution with a fair hand, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, ubiquitous missile silos, and state-planned economy. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 6.148 billion Great Lake Statesians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Chicago. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Great Lake Statesian economy, worth a remarkable 1,332 trillion Gold Dinars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 216,761 Gold Dinars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government helps teach children how to kill a man from six paces, conscripts often volunteer for a second tour of duty so they can get a ticket to next year's Army Revue, the new national campaign exhorts men to "Show Some Class - Don't Sit On Your Ass", and the 'three Rs' have become the 'four Rs' with the addition of Rightful Thought. Crime is totally unknown. The Great Lake States's national animal is the Wolverine, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

The Great Lake States is ranked 100,239^th in the world and 5^th in Great Lakes Alliance for Lowest Crime Rates, with 65.83 law-abiding acts per hour.