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«12. . .7,6457,6467,6477,6487,6497,6507,651. . .7,9097,910»

Not first for civil right anymore😒

Coryanhafflaruda and Nouveu iberia

The Coelum Chronicle
"The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth"

Interviews: Resurrection of the Far-Right?
Tadhana Commune, New Coelum, Beatitas; 4:07 pm, October 24th, 5734 OC

For hundreds of years, the Liberal Party of Beatitas was a major player in the political scene, returning hundreds of MPs to Coelum every election and routinely winning a seat on the seven-member Federal Council. However, each succeeding generation swung further and further to the left. From the first government formed by the Socialist Party in 5259 OC

Beatitas wrote:News That Is Broken (Figuratively, Of Course, I Mean If It Were Literally, It'd Also Be Really Cool, But That's Not True, So Let's Get Back To The News, Shall We?)

"A spectre is haunting Beatitas—the spectre of communism," said the leader of Beatitas' Socialist Party, after it won the recent election.

The attendance of the Socialist Party's victory rally, where the above speech was made (click to expand), is estimated to be in the millions.

to the present, the Liberal Party has only been in government thrice, and only once have they provided a President of the Federal Council. By the time of the formal dissolution of the state in 5420 OC, the Liberal Party had only been winning 2% of the national vote. The Census of 5730 OC only recorded two registered Liberal Party members in the entire nation of 7,539. However, that number has since increased by 50% to three—and with important consequences for the country. In last week's local elections, Liz Torien, the party's newest member, was elected to the position of Tadhana Commune Secretary. Her election marked the first time the Liberals were represented in elected office for 87 years.

The Coelum Chronicle's Senior Political Correspondent, Peter Simmons, travelled to the Lloyd George mansion in Tadhana Commune to attend a Liberal Party meeting. The meeting was held in a conference room larger than some houses near New Coelum's center. It was decorated with Liberal memorabilia all over, with a gigantic banner above the room's two occupants reading, "The Liberal Party of Beatitas". Its subtitle read, "100 years old and stronger than ever!" The Liberal Party is nearly three-quarters of a millennium old.

Peter Simmons: I'm glad to visit you folks!
Liz Torien: Well, it's great having you over.
Abraham Lloyd George: It really is. Peter, would you like some tea? Mother is making some.
P: I figured someone was missing! Sure, I'll have a glass or two.
Abraham then asks his mother to bring an extra glass over.
P: Liz, how did you discover the far-right, and what led you to it?
She glared at me for what seemed like a millisecond, but managed to keep her composure.
L: Liberalism is not a far-right ideology. But, anyways, here's my story. I was at a little coffee shop last December, and I sat down at a table. Next to me was Abe, but I didn't know him back then. He was working on his laptop, and I couldn't help but sneak a peek at what he was doing. I read the words, "5734 OC Manifesto of the Liberal Party of Beatitas". I'd meant to say, "You guys still exist?" in my head, but something went wrong...and I accidentally blurted it out instead. Abe looked up at me and smiled. He said, "Yeah. It's just me and mother left!" I laughed, then he laughed, then before you know it, we were best friends! The two of us debated and debated about politics a lot...I can't believe I used to be a commie.
She slowly shook her head.
L: By July, I gave in. I admitted that he was right and joined the Liberals. Now, I'm the commune secretary!
By then, Abraham's mother had returned with a pitcher of tea and three fancy glasses. She sat down next to her son.
P: Now that your party has acquired a third member, will y'all have a fourth one any soon?
Mary Lloyd George: Certainly. Liz is excellent at persuading people. Right now, I'm reviewing eight membership applications and she tells me that twenty-ish are coming soon!
A: How did you become party leader, Mary?
M: The last few centuries, party leadership has been pretty much passed on hereditarily. Not because we're a kingdom or anything, but because, frankly, the Lloyd Georges are the only Liberal family out there. My husband was leader until about a hundred and fifty years ago, when he left the party. I've been in control ever since.
P: You haven't tried to expand since?
M: I thought that there wasn't any point. The hideous communists control everything now. They have everyone under their thumb.
P: Uh, well, what're the party's long-term plans?
A: We wish to gather a group of like-minded people, and then buil-
Liz quickly reached over the table and covered his mouth. She glared at him, but this time, her glare was much longer. Mary covered her eyes and shook her head.
P: I, uh, guess I'll get going now. Thanks for your time.

I was about to publish this article when someone called me. It was Soren Svensson, Mary's former husband, and former leader of the Liberal Party.

Soren Svensson: Hi, is this Peter Simmons of the Coelum Chronicle?
Peter Simmons: I am he...who are you, if I may ask?
S: Oh, how rude of me. I'm Soren Svensson, Mary Lloyd George's former wife.
P: Well then, hi. Anything you want to talk about?
S: Please publish the transcripts of this call in your article; it's of utm-
P: I'm sorry, how do you know that I'm publishing an article later this afternoon?
S: I have my sources! But please, publish this. Will you?
P: Fine...
S: I have a solemn warning to the Beata people: DO NOT LISTEN TO MY EX-WIFE AND TO THE PROPAGANDA OF THE LIBERAL PARTY. I can safely say that she's the worst person I've ever known, and that the Liberal Party is the most toxic and dangerous society to ever exist in modern Beatitas. If the far-right reactionaries get their way, then our society will regress half a millennium!
P: As Mary's ex-husband, aren't you a little biased?
S: No! It's the other way around! I'm the only person in the country who actually knows how dangerous these people are. Here, I'll tell you all about their platform. My source: the 5572 OC Manifesto. I wrote it...when I was younger and much more naive. Look at this, we advocate for capitalism. Capitalism. We callled for minting money. We wanted a state, too. About that, Mary and I often referred to the Tragedy of 5420. That was when Beatitas disestablished the state. And, get this, we didn't even believe in universal healthcare! I realize how terrible these policies now...they'd have led to so many unnecessary deaths. Most terribly, we wanted a military. A MILITARY! So, I cannot stress enough, do not vote for the Liberal Party. No reasonable people would under reasonable circumstances.

Aidviet union, Coryanhafflaruda, and Nouveu iberia

Beatitas wrote:
The Coelum Chronicle
"The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth"

Interviews: Resurrection of the Far-Right?
Tadhana Commune, New Coelum, Beatitas; 4:07 pm, October 24th, 5734 OC

For hundreds of years, the Liberal Party of Beatitas was a major player in the political scene, returning hundreds of MPs to Coelum every election and routinely winning a seat on the seven-member Federal Council. However, each succeeding generation swung further and further to the left. From the first government formed by the Socialist Party in 5259 OC
The attendance of the Socialist Party's victory rally, where the above speech was made (click to expand), is estimated to be in the millions.

to the present, the Liberal Party has only been in government thrice, and only once have they provided a President of the Federal Council. By the time of the formal dissolution of the state in 5420 OC, the Liberal Party had only been winning 2% of the national vote. The Census of 5730 OC only recorded two registered Liberal Party members in the entire nation of 7,539. However, that number has since increased by 50% to three—and with important consequences for the country. In last week's local elections, Liz Torien, the party's newest member, was elected to the position of Tadhana Commune Secretary. Her election marked the first time the Liberals were represented in elected office for 87 years.

The Coelum Chronicle's Senior Political Correspondent, Peter Simmons, travelled to the Lloyd George mansion in Tadhana Commune to attend a Liberal Party meeting. The meeting was held in a conference room larger than some houses near New Coelum's center. It was decorated with Liberal memorabilia all over, with a gigantic banner above the room's two occupants reading, "The Liberal Party of Beatitas". Its subtitle read, "100 years old and stronger than ever!" The Liberal Party is nearly three-quarters of a millennium old.

Peter Simmons: I'm glad to visit you folks!
Liz Torien: Well, it's great having you over.
Abraham Lloyd George: It really is. Peter, would you like some tea? Mother is making some.
P: I figured someone was missing! Sure, I'll have a glass or two.
Abraham then asks his mother to bring an extra glass over.
P: Liz, how did you discover the far-right, and what led you to it?
She glared at me for what seemed like a millisecond, but managed to keep her composure.
L: Liberalism is not a far-right ideology. But, anyways, here's my story. I was at a little coffee shop last December, and I sat down at a table. Next to me was Abe, but I didn't know him back then. He was working on his laptop, and I couldn't help but sneak a peek at what he was doing. I read the words, "5734 OC Manifesto of the Liberal Party of Beatitas". I'd meant to say, "You guys still exist?" in my head, but something went wrong...and I accidentally blurted it out instead. Abe looked up at me and smiled. He said, "Yeah. It's just me and mother left!" I laughed, then he laughed, then before you know it, we were best friends! The two of us debated and debated about politics a lot...I can't believe I used to be a commie.
She slowly shook her head.
L: By July, I gave in. I admitted that he was right and joined the Liberals. Now, I'm the commune secretary!
By then, Abraham's mother had returned with a pitcher of tea and three fancy glasses. She sat down next to her son.
P: Now that your party has acquired a third member, will y'all have a fourth one any soon?
Mary Lloyd George: Certainly. Liz is excellent at persuading people. Right now, I'm reviewing eight membership applications and she tells me that twenty-ish are coming soon!
A: How did you become party leader, Mary?
M: The last few centuries, party leadership has been pretty much passed on hereditarily. Not because we're a kingdom or anything, but because, frankly, the Lloyd Georges are the only Liberal family out there. My husband was leader until about a hundred and fifty years ago, when he left the party. I've been in control ever since.
P: You haven't tried to expand since?
M: I thought that there wasn't any point. The hideous communists control everything now. They have everyone under their thumb.
P: Uh, well, what're the party's long-term plans?
A: We wish to gather a group of like-minded people, and then buil-
Liz quickly reached over the table and covered his mouth. She glared at him, but this time, her glare was much longer. Mary covered her eyes and shook her head.
P: I, uh, guess I'll get going now. Thanks for your time.

I was about to publish this article when someone called me. It was Soren Svensson, Mary's former husband, and former leader of the Liberal Party.

Soren Svensson: Hi, is this Peter Simmons of the Coelum Chronicle?
Peter Simmons: I am he...who are you, if I may ask?
S: Oh, how rude of me. I'm Soren Svensson, Mary Lloyd George's former wife.
P: Well then, hi. Anything you want to talk about?
S: Please publish the transcripts of this call in your article; it's of utm-
P: I'm sorry, how do you know that I'm publishing an article later this afternoon?
S: I have my sources! But please, publish this. Will you?
P: Fine...
S: I have a solemn warning to the Beata people: DO NOT LISTEN TO MY EX-WIFE AND TO THE PROPAGANDA OF THE LIBERAL PARTY. I can safely say that she's the worst person I've ever known, and that the Liberal Party is the most toxic and dangerous society to ever exist in modern Beatitas. If the far-right reactionaries get their way, then our society will regress half a millennium!
P: As Mary's ex-husband, aren't you a little biased?
S: No! It's the other way around! I'm the only person in the country who actually knows how dangerous these people are. Here, I'll tell you all about their platform. My source: the 5572 OC Manifesto. I wrote it...when I was younger and much more naive. Look at this, we advocate for capitalism. Capitalism. We callled for minting money. We wanted a state, too. About that, Mary and I often referred to the Tragedy of 5420. That was when Beatitas disestablished the state. And, get this, we didn't even believe in universal healthcare! I realize how terrible these policies now...they'd have led to so many unnecessary deaths. Most terribly, we wanted a military. A MILITARY! So, I cannot stress enough, do not vote for the Liberal Party. No reasonable people would under reasonable circumstances.

You really went all the way back to a year for that message?

Coryanhafflaruda, Beatitas, and Nouveu iberia

Aidviet union wrote:You really went all the way back to a year for that message?

omg I thought you were joking 😳 damnnnnn.... Beatitas really is giving it their all, aren't they... P R O RP

Aidviet union, Coryanhafflaruda, and Beatitas

Beatitas wrote:
The Coelum Chronicle
"The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth"

Interviews: Resurrection of the Far-Right?
Tadhana Commune, New Coelum, Beatitas; 4:07 pm, October 24th, 5734 OC

For hundreds of years, the Liberal Party of Beatitas was a major player in the political scene, returning hundreds of MPs to Coelum every election and routinely winning a seat on the seven-member Federal Council. However, each succeeding generation swung further and further to the left. From the first government formed by the Socialist Party in 5259 OC
The attendance of the Socialist Party's victory rally, where the above speech was made (click to expand), is estimated to be in the millions.

to the present, the Liberal Party has only been in government thrice, and only once have they provided a President of the Federal Council. By the time of the formal dissolution of the state in 5420 OC, the Liberal Party had only been winning 2% of the national vote. The Census of 5730 OC only recorded two registered Liberal Party members in the entire nation of 7,539. However, that number has since increased by 50% to three—and with important consequences for the country. In last week's local elections, Liz Torien, the party's newest member, was elected to the position of Tadhana Commune Secretary. Her election marked the first time the Liberals were represented in elected office for 87 years.

The Coelum Chronicle's Senior Political Correspondent, Peter Simmons, travelled to the Lloyd George mansion in Tadhana Commune to attend a Liberal Party meeting. The meeting was held in a conference room larger than some houses near New Coelum's center. It was decorated with Liberal memorabilia all over, with a gigantic banner above the room's two occupants reading, "The Liberal Party of Beatitas". Its subtitle read, "100 years old and stronger than ever!" The Liberal Party is nearly three-quarters of a millennium old.

Peter Simmons: I'm glad to visit you folks!
Liz Torien: Well, it's great having you over.
Abraham Lloyd George: It really is. Peter, would you like some tea? Mother is making some.
P: I figured someone was missing! Sure, I'll have a glass or two.
Abraham then asks his mother to bring an extra glass over.
P: Liz, how did you discover the far-right, and what led you to it?
She glared at me for what seemed like a millisecond, but managed to keep her composure.
L: Liberalism is not a far-right ideology. But, anyways, here's my story. I was at a little coffee shop last December, and I sat down at a table. Next to me was Abe, but I didn't know him back then. He was working on his laptop, and I couldn't help but sneak a peek at what he was doing. I read the words, "5734 OC Manifesto of the Liberal Party of Beatitas". I'd meant to say, "You guys still exist?" in my head, but something went wrong...and I accidentally blurted it out instead. Abe looked up at me and smiled. He said, "Yeah. It's just me and mother left!" I laughed, then he laughed, then before you know it, we were best friends! The two of us debated and debated about politics a lot...I can't believe I used to be a commie.
She slowly shook her head.
L: By July, I gave in. I admitted that he was right and joined the Liberals. Now, I'm the commune secretary!
By then, Abraham's mother had returned with a pitcher of tea and three fancy glasses. She sat down next to her son.
P: Now that your party has acquired a third member, will y'all have a fourth one any soon?
Mary Lloyd George: Certainly. Liz is excellent at persuading people. Right now, I'm reviewing eight membership applications and she tells me that twenty-ish are coming soon!
A: How did you become party leader, Mary?
M: The last few centuries, party leadership has been pretty much passed on hereditarily. Not because we're a kingdom or anything, but because, frankly, the Lloyd Georges are the only Liberal family out there. My husband was leader until about a hundred and fifty years ago, when he left the party. I've been in control ever since.
P: You haven't tried to expand since?
M: I thought that there wasn't any point. The hideous communists control everything now. They have everyone under their thumb.
P: Uh, well, what're the party's long-term plans?
A: We wish to gather a group of like-minded people, and then buil-
Liz quickly reached over the table and covered his mouth. She glared at him, but this time, her glare was much longer. Mary covered her eyes and shook her head.
P: I, uh, guess I'll get going now. Thanks for your time.

I was about to publish this article when someone called me. It was Soren Svensson, Mary's former husband, and former leader of the Liberal Party.

Soren Svensson: Hi, is this Peter Simmons of the Coelum Chronicle?
Peter Simmons: I am he...who are you, if I may ask?
S: Oh, how rude of me. I'm Soren Svensson, Mary Lloyd George's former wife.
P: Well then, hi. Anything you want to talk about?
S: Please publish the transcripts of this call in your article; it's of utm-
P: I'm sorry, how do you know that I'm publishing an article later this afternoon?
S: I have my sources! But please, publish this. Will you?
P: Fine...
S: I have a solemn warning to the Beata people: DO NOT LISTEN TO MY EX-WIFE AND TO THE PROPAGANDA OF THE LIBERAL PARTY. I can safely say that she's the worst person I've ever known, and that the Liberal Party is the most toxic and dangerous society to ever exist in modern Beatitas. If the far-right reactionaries get their way, then our society will regress half a millennium!
P: As Mary's ex-husband, aren't you a little biased?
S: No! It's the other way around! I'm the only person in the country who actually knows how dangerous these people are. Here, I'll tell you all about their platform. My source: the 5572 OC Manifesto. I wrote it...when I was younger and much more naive. Look at this, we advocate for capitalism. Capitalism. We callled for minting money. We wanted a state, too. About that, Mary and I often referred to the Tragedy of 5420. That was when Beatitas disestablished the state. And, get this, we didn't even believe in universal healthcare! I realize how terrible these policies now...they'd have led to so many unnecessary deaths. Most terribly, we wanted a military. A MILITARY! So, I cannot stress enough, do not vote for the Liberal Party. No reasonable people would under reasonable circumstances.

The days when Voopmont did stuff 😔

Aidviet union, Coryanhafflaruda, Beatitas, and Nouveu iberia

Aidviet union wrote:You really went all the way back to a year for that message?

Not really that hard to find! I just searched, "Socialist Party" on the RMB and found it.

Aidviet union and Coryanhafflaruda

Beatitas wrote:Not really that hard to find! I just searched, "Socialist Party" on the RMB and found it.

Ohhh ok lol

I'm calling a general discussion to spur new ideas of things we can do to boost TUF's activity and members. Everyone is welcome to contributing. I know we can do this, we did this many times already, we can do it again.

East eria, Aidviet union, Coryanhafflaruda, Beatitas, and 1 otherNouveu iberia

Somehow making Information Technology raise its wages makes the the poor 10% income go down and the richest go up

The VSSR Anarcho-Communists have created an agreement with Ster Lovinia to join them in exchange for representation in the law and decreased government authority in areas that vote to do so.
This seems to mark the end of The Old Republic (a group of hardline Kalinovists, Kalinov being the first Communist leader of the VSSR, and Kalinovism being similar to Stalinism) due to the general hate of authoritarianism in the new Ster Lovinia.
The civil war seems to be coming to a close
(Also for lore reasons I need to have a land border with a aggressive authoritarian background so if anyone's nation meets that criteria tell me if you want to claim a bordering colony or a area to be your mainland since maps don't really get used in this region)

Coryanhafflaruda and Shemanian states

Cevlaia wrote:I'm calling a general discussion to spur new ideas of things we can do to boost TUF's activity and members. Everyone is welcome to contributing. I know we can do this, we did this many times already, we can do it again.

I know I have not been very active here since months ago so I do not know much how you guys have developed and what choices you have made... but I was thinking of maybe bring in some horror theme to spice it up you know?

I have officially crossed the 9 year mark since my nation was founded, Jesus its doesn't feel like it.

congratulations

The Green Nation, Coryanhafflaruda, and Shemanian states

The Green Nation wrote:I have officially crossed the 9 year mark since my nation was founded, Jesus its doesn't feel like it.

Ancient

The Green Nation, Coryanhafflaruda, and Shemanian states

The new empire of bigboom

can we get some polls?

The new empire of bigboom wrote:can we get some polls?

there you go

The Green Nation wrote:I have officially crossed the 9 year mark since my nation was founded, Jesus its doesn't feel like it.

happy birfday

The Green Nation, Coryanhafflaruda, and Shemanian states

The Green Nation wrote:I have officially crossed the 9 year mark since my nation was founded, Jesus its doesn't feel like it.

wow congrats on 9 yrs !

The Green Nation, Coryanhafflaruda, and Shemanian states

GOOD MORNING AMERICA

The New United Socialist Random Empire, Coryanhafflaruda, Beatitas, The new empire of bigboom, and 1 otherShemanian states

GOOD NIGHT MALAYSIAN 370

The New United Socialist Random Empire, Coryanhafflaruda, Beatitas, The new empire of bigboom, and 1 otherShemanian states

Aidviet union wrote:GOOD NIGHT MALAYSIAN 370

Famous last words

Aidviet union, Coryanhafflaruda, Beatitas, The new empire of bigboom, and 1 otherShemanian states

Hippo resolution 😳

Coryanhafflaruda and Shemanian states

The Coelum Chronicle at 1000!
"The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth."

Issue No. 365,243

The Planned Liberal Commune(ity?): Echo Chamber or Gathering of the Like-Minded?
New Coelum, Beatitas; 5:26 am, March 11th, 5738 OC
by Peter Simmons and Liz Torien

Echo Chamber
by Peter Simmons

Since my interview with the party's then-three members and the party leader's ex-husband, they have revealed themselves to be much worse than your common far-right group. My reporting has shown that the party, now with 187 members, is quite similar to a cult. Exhibit 1: individual party members speak so highly of the inner circle, especially Liz Torien, that one would think that gods and goddesses rule over the Liberals. Exhibit 2, the shameless attempt of the shepherds to fence their sheep in, is what I will focus on today.

They want to call it "Beatitas City". With starry eyes, they say their community (yes, not commune) shall be a shining beacon of reason, illuminating the void, exposing its misshapen surface. Perhaps, though, a more appropriate name would be "Liberal Headquarters and Ideological Purity Camp". From leaked documents published by the Guardian, we can tell that "only Liberal Party members will be permitted to join Beatitas City", that "near the community's center will be a school, Young Liberals School", and that "all outsiders will have to acquire a permit to enter Beatitass [sic] City to ensure the safety of its citizens. For the same reasons, all citizens will have to acquire a permit to exit Beatitas City". Allowing Beatitas City to be built would destroy the lives of innumerable youngsters born to Liberal parents. From birth, children will only be exposed to Liberal ideas, being taught by Liberal teachers. This will ensure that, within two decades, a generation of perfectly subservient zealots will be among us.

Beatitas City is not only probably illegal. It is conceived to stifle any thoughts, hopes, and desires not approved by Liz Lorien herself. This coming November, be sure to vote against the formation of Beatitas City, else you will be complicit in the most heinous crime to ever occur in this country in the last century.

Haven of the Like-Minded
by Liz Lorien

I am afraid to let my child leave my house. Sure, I could, but doing so would put little Ted in great danger. Why is it, you ask, that my child cannot walk outside? Isn't violent crime nonexistent? To them, I say that he must stay inside because he, along with all other Liberal Party members, is a solitary tree in a thunderstorm.

We Liberals are currently few and far between. To outsiders, we are pieces of prey. In the streets, we are unwelcome. In the homes of our neighbors, we are always told to please come back next time. We can only feel safe in our own homes. Even though they are not Liberals, and so are not in as great a danger as their Liberal peers, I also cannot keep myself from mourning other children in Beatitas. They are growing in a broken society. According to a recent poll, 40% of Beata confess that they "habitually do not wear any clothes outside of their own houses". As one would imagine, this has led to many incidences of public lovemaking, especially in New Coelum Park. No child deserves to live in a society where such indecencies are not only tolerated, not only legal, but also oft-accepted as a celebration of love.

From that sprung an idea. Why not create our own community wherein any child can be safe playing outside? That community, of course, is Beatitas City. However, due to the slander thrown at us, Beatitas City is almost universally depicted as a hellish echo chamber. Guard yourself from thesse accusations! They are the reason Beatitas City would need to be closed to most outsiders. We cannot have their lies and immoralities destroying our land.

In November, vote to allow our grand idea to come to fruition! You know in your heart that it is the only right option.

Thank you for reading this article! Feel free to leave a comment, which will appear here promptly. Perhaps tell us what you think of this article and whether you're going to vote for or against the formation of Beatitas City (if you don't live in Beatitas, you can say which side you'd take if you did live here!)

Comments:

Aidviet union, Coryanhafflaruda, and The new empire of bigboom

Beatitas wrote:

The Coelum Chronicle at 1000!
"The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth."

Issue No. 365,243

The Planned Liberal Commune(ity?): Echo Chamber or Gathering of the Like-Minded?
New Coelum, Beatitas; 5:26 am, March 11th, 5738 OC
by Peter Simmons and Liz Torien

Echo Chamber
by Peter Simmons

Since my interview with the party's then-three members and the party leader's ex-husband, they have revealed themselves to be much worse than your common far-right group. My reporting has shown that the party, now with 187 members, is quite similar to a cult. Exhibit 1: individual party members speak so highly of the inner circle, especially Liz Torien, that one would think that gods and goddesses rule over the Liberals. Exhibit 2, the shameless attempt of the shepherds to fence their sheep in, is what I will focus on today.

They want to call it "Beatitas City". With starry eyes, they say their community (yes, not commune) shall be a shining beacon of reason, illuminating the void, exposing its misshapen surface. Perhaps, though, a more appropriate name would be "Liberal Headquarters and Ideological Purity Camp". From leaked documents published by the Guardian, we can tell that "only Liberal Party members will be permitted to join Beatitas City", that "near the community's center will be a school, Young Liberals School", and that "all outsiders will have to acquire a permit to enter Beatitass [sic] City to ensure the safety of its citizens. For the same reasons, all citizens will have to acquire a permit to exit Beatitas City". Allowing Beatitas City to be built would destroy the lives of innumerable youngsters born to Liberal parents. From birth, children will only be exposed to Liberal ideas, being taught by Liberal teachers. This will ensure that, within two decades, a generation of perfectly subservient zealots will be among us.

Beatitas City is not only probably illegal. It is conceived to stifle any thoughts, hopes, and desires not approved by Liz Lorien herself. This coming November, be sure to vote against the formation of Beatitas City, else you will be complicit in the most heinous crime to ever occur in this country in the last century.

Haven of the Like-Minded
by Liz Lorien

I am afraid to let my child leave my house. Sure, I could, but doing so would put little Ted in great danger. Why is it, you ask, that my child cannot walk outside? Isn't violent crime nonexistent? To them, I say that he must stay inside because he, along with all other Liberal Party members, is a solitary tree in a thunderstorm.

We Liberals are currently few and far between. To outsiders, we are pieces of prey. In the streets, we are unwelcome. In the homes of our neighbors, we are always told to please come back next time. We can only feel safe in our own homes. Even though they are not Liberals, and so are not in as great a danger as their Liberal peers, I also cannot keep myself from mourning other children in Beatitas. They are growing in a broken society. According to a recent poll, 40% of Beata confess that they "habitually do not wear any clothes outside of their own houses". As one would imagine, this has led to many incidences of public lovemaking, especially in New Coelum Park. No child deserves to live in a society where such indecencies are not only tolerated, not only legal, but also oft-accepted as a celebration of love.

From that sprung an idea. Why not create our own community wherein any child can be safe playing outside? That community, of course, is Beatitas City. However, due to the slander thrown at us, Beatitas City is almost universally depicted as a hellish echo chamber. Guard yourself from thesse accusations! They are the reason Beatitas City would need to be closed to most outsiders. We cannot have their lies and immoralities destroying our land.

In November, vote to allow our grand idea to come to fruition! You know in your heart that it is the only right option.

Thank you for reading this article! Feel free to leave a comment, which will appear here promptly. Perhaps tell us what you think of this article and whether you're going to vote for or against the formation of Beatitas City (if you don't live in Beatitas, you can say which side you'd take if you did live here!)

Comments:

darn libtard

Coryanhafflaruda, Beatitas, and The new empire of bigboom

«12. . .7,6457,6467,6477,6487,6497,6507,651. . .7,9097,910»

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