The United Socialist States of Pisz is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Andrzej Szymborski with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 4.883 billion Piszians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized government prioritizes Spirituality, with Law & Order, Administration, and Education also on the agenda, while International Aid isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pisz. The average income tax rate is 34.8%.

The Piszian economy, worth 277 trillion złoties a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Automobile Manufacturing, Retail, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 56,912 złoties, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.5 times as much as the poorest.

Government officials frequently cut taxes as a distraction from antics with their secretaries, the "temporary replacement bus service" is now a permanent fixture, pocket dialling is a criminal offence, and mothers drive their college-graduate children to work. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Pisz's national animal is the wolf, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Pisz is ranked 82,015^th in the world and 2^nd in European Centre for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring 4,000.04 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.