*At the final of the Sport Society Classic-600kg Tug of War, Team SB has failed to win the golden shield, shocking sports predictors around the country. Speaking to the world press after the event, coach Román Pérez Harper reiterated his congratulations to the victors and agreed that the squad’s silver shield is “a worthy outcome but certainly not the one we endlessly trained for.” Pérez refused to comment on whether this was his last SSC as coaching of the South Baban Tug of War team*