by Max Barry

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The World World Census

The Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry in the World

The World Census measured the rate of desertification in order to calculate which nations have the largest timber industry.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The PS2 Puppet of AskatopiaPsychotic Dictatorship“Stop reading my motto!”
2.The Sadistic Republic of Bright AngelPsychotic Dictatorship“Get Outa Here!!”
3.The Incorporated States of UniserveIron Fist Consumerists“Our upstream provider did it!”
4.The Dominion of TeufelvolkLeft-Leaning College State“Fight to the death!”
5.The Corporate Dictatorship of JosephlandCorporate Police State“Oderint Dum Metuant”
6.The Popsicle Pete Nation of ClenchIron Fist Consumerists“NONE OF YOU ARE SAFE!”
7.The Unassuming Puppet State of AmericadCorporate Police State“An equal opportunity hate group.”
8.The Little Brotherhood of The Real MatrixIron Fist Consumerists“Guns. Lots of guns.”
9.The Holy Empire of HaedliaIron Fist Consumerists“For the blessed nation!”
10.The Armed Republic of Knowwear in YoutopiaIron Fist Consumerists“Give pea... ummm... war a chance.”
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