by Max Barry

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The Fattest Citizens in Valley of Peace

World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."

NationWA CategoryMotto
11.The Republic of SS Jayron KearseMoralistic Democracy“You Can't Stop Progress”
12.The Principality of WalneireginFather Knows Best State“Twirling Toward Freedom”
13.The Kingdom of OldonNew York Times Democracy“For God and King”
14.The Grand Royal Monarchy of Kingdom of OdnoradlaMoralistic Democracy“How Great Thou Art!”
15.The Oppressed Peoples of Ste NelandInoffensive Centrist Democracy“Mission Accomplished”
16.The Republic of SS CJ Gardner-JohnsonInoffensive Centrist Democracy“Twirling Toward Freedom”
17.The Commonwealth of Takkaviita CXXXVIInoffensive Centrist Democracy“Fireplace cloak”
18.The Colony of New ChaurCivil Rights Lovefest“Strength Through Freedom”
19.The Dojo of Kung-Fu KangarooConservative Democracy“Virtue”
20.The New Vegas Wasteland of Lucky 38 Resort and CasinoCompulsory Consumerist State“Truth Is, The Game Was Rigged From The Start”
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