The Fattest Citizens in The New Meritocracy
World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."
 | Nation | WA Category | Motto | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1. |  The Radioactive Republic of Jasque | Civil Rights Lovefest | “Make yourselves sheep and the wolves will eat you.” | |
| 2. |  The Holy Meritocratic Republic of Argyres | Anarchy | “Fluctuat nec mergitur!” | |
| 3. |  The Matriarchy of The Pole Dancers | Civil Rights Lovefest | “Tip More for Better Service!” | |
| 4. |  The D'deridex-Class WarBird of LegMiner10 | Psychotic Dictatorship | “Romulus” | |
| 5. |  The Free Republic of Frappuccino | Capitalist Paradise | “mmm... coffee” |
