by Max Barry

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The East Pacific World Census

The Fattest Citizens in The East Pacific

World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."

As a region, The East Pacific is ranked 8,704th in the world for Fattest Citizens.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Free and Holy Republic of The Happy CiviliansCorporate Police State“Perfectly Fine, Thank You....”
2.The Holy Matriarchy of The Blessed and Holy LandCorporate Police State“Praise be to our Holy Goddess”
3.The Republic of Bai LungCorporate Police State“Three Principles of the People”
4.The Dictatorship of Walter HeisenbergCorporate Police State“Tread lightly”
5.The Oppressed Peoples of IronfistanCompulsory Consumerist State“Authority Through Compliance”
6.The Holy Empire of DonttreadonmeistanCapitalist Paradise“Don't tread on me”
7.The Corporate-Owned Kingdom of Economic NirvanaCorporate Bordello“Increased profits create happiness.”
8.The Unrepublic of Orwellian ObserversAnarchy“Down with Big Brother!”
9.The Holy Galactic Imperium of StalanatisCorporate Police State“God's garden is only open to the worthy”
10.The GangLand of 7-5Anarchy“This is business. And I want all of yours!”
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