by Max Barry

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The Highest Unexpected Death Rate in Texas

The World Census paid their respects at cemeteries in order to determine how likely citizens were to die each year from unnatural causes, such as crime, preventable illness, accident, and government encouragement.

As a region, Texas is ranked 2,345th in the world for Highest Unexpected Death Rate.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Barnes-Free Conglomerate of Ewing Oil CoCapitalist Paradise“In J.R. We Trust”
2.The Big Tex Happy Taco Stands of NewTexasCivil Rights Lovefest“Free Universe-Famous Bean & Cheese Taco /w Every Order!”
3.The Holy Empire of DogbreathistanCapitalist Paradise“Nation created for the TNP purge 3MAR2010”
4.The Smelly City of Sardine WorldInoffensive Centrist Democracy“Freshly Processed Sardines”
5.The Empire of The Promethean FistsCompulsory Consumerist State“Ferrus Dominus”
6.The Natural Order of ItzomaMoralistic Democracy“You talkin to the wrong mf'ers if propriety is involved”
7.The Confederate States of Ole DixielandCapitalist Paradise“Deo Vindice”
8.The Borderlands of Outer TexiaAnarchy“By The People For The People”
9.The Pirate League of MocanaquaInoffensive Centrist Democracy“No Prey, No Pay”
10.The Strategic Petroleum Reserve of East Texas Oil FieldFather Knows Best State“Black Gold, Texas Tea”
1234. . .910»