by Max Barry

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Ridgefield World Census

The Fattest Citizens in Ridgefield

World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."

As a region, Ridgefield is ranked 7,218th in the world for Fattest Citizens.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Golden Liberty Hounds of DiRito-OpolisCapitalist Paradise“Trade in gold, be free, and be economically aware.”
2.The Town of RidgefieldersAnarchy“Eight Years of Ridgefield”
3.The Galactic Country of GreenfeatherAnarchy“If it bleeds, we can kill it.”
4.The Commonwealth of ElephantinusCompulsory Consumerist State“Death is preferable to socialism”
5.The Kingdom of BlastislaviaCorporate Police State“Trevor did it, not me”
6.The Grand Duchy of IriarteRight-wing Utopia“Ad iustitiam per ius”
7.The Federal Republic of AxelvilleCorporate Bordello“Got it memorized?”
8.The Free Land of Rojava Free StateLeft-Leaning College State“God save our cult of personality cause tourists are $”
9.The Dictatorship of DubyIron Fist Consumerists“You're Not Important ”
10.The Allied States of TuedoriaLeft-wing Utopia“From Many, One”