by Max Barry

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The Fattest Citizens in Conch Kingdom

World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."

As a region, Conch Kingdom is ranked 14,484th in the world for Fattest Citizens.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Camembert-Loving Federation of CharvilleAnarchy“Distan Forever”
2.The Corporate Conglomerate of Supero OmniaCivil Rights Lovefest“I Overcome All”
3.The Generally Free Land of StustuAnarchy“Live Free, unless you like Hawaiian Pizza”
4.The United Socialist States of TulovNew York Times Democracy“Proletariat, the Blackbirds lead our way!”
5.The Incorporated States of StinkypoopylandCorporate Bordello“Make money or die lmao”
6.The Imperial Shogunate of Oshima BafukuLibertarian Police State“Shori e”
7.The Reborn Nation of Capitalists UnionsCapitalist Paradise“Face the fear ,build the future”
8.The Free Land of McdonaldsMartLeft-Leaning College State“With the power of capitalism we'll make robots real”
9.The Free Land of LibertayiaAnarchy“NO STEP ON SNEK”
10.The Armed Republic of Snazzy ShapiroCompulsory Consumerist State“ Facts don't care about your feelings”
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