The Fattest Citizens in the Pacific
World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."
 | Nation | World | Obesity Rate | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1. |  The Grand Duchy of Mustanoki | 94th | 48.72 | ||
| 2. |  The Dictatorship of Lor Sama | 112th | 43.91 | ||
| 3. |  The Holy Empire of Nuru Amani | 156th | 35.69 | ||
| 4. |  The Democratic Republic of Kohili | 203rd | 31.68 | ||
| 5. |  The Republic of Tsancity Claran | 260th | 27.23 | ||
| 6. |  The Principality of Oyne | 596th | 18.01 | ||
| 7. |  The Free Land of Anarch Run | 853rd | 16.9 | ||
| 8. |  The Rogue Nation of Egotistia | 1,045th | 16.46 | ||
| 9. |  The Republic of NUMBAONEYO | 1,084th | 16.39 | ||
| 10. |  The Holy Empire of Metropolitan Romanovian Russia | 1,395th | 15.91 | ||
