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by The Meow-vellous Christmas Land of Valentine Z. . 32 reads.

Weapon of Mass Pacifism - Meow Missile - Info and Sale Ledger

The Valentian Defense Industry is proud to present our latest offering for nations with pacifism in mind... The Meow Missile!


* Large Cat not included.

What is it?

It is basically a refurbished ICBM with all the explosives taken out and instead is jam-packed with telecommunications equipment.

How does it work?

When launched to a designated target, its sharp point will poke onto the ground. Given the nature of the sharpish tip, it's still a good practice to launch it at desolate places, lest you ironically killed someone with its landing. After it landed successfully, the transmitters inside will broadcast a video clip on all frequencies, hijacking equipments included but not limited to: Televisions, PDAs, Cell phones, Radios, Smartphones, Laptops, Desktops. The video lasts 30 seconds, with the first 20 seconds being randomised series of clips of cats and kittens, ranging from playing with their toys, to purring and meowing. The last 10 seconds will show a personalised message "[YOUR NATION NAME] would like to negotiate with you peacefully!". After the 30 sec clip is over, all the affected devices will went back to normal, without a trace of the clips being inside.

Is it safe?

Other than the dangerous nature of a missile landing on someone unfortunate, it is pretty much safe. The transmission will not affect medical devices, and emergency calls being made at the time of transmission will not be intercepted through a series of algoraithms and program accompanying the transmission (e.g. if a cell phone is making a call to an emergency service, the transmission will arrive on the phone, but will delay the interception until the call is over. The transmission deletes itself if it detects that it's inside a medical device.)

Specifications:

Length: 30 meters
Radius (largest cross-section): 3.35 meters.
Cruise speed: 4000 km/h.
Overdrive speed: 8000 km/h, uses fuel twice as fast.
Power: Hydrogen Fuel Cell.
Range: 20000 km.
Material: An alloy of Titanium and Aluminium.
Transmission Range: User-Adjustable, from 1 km to 2000 km.
Cost: 100,000 Valentian Credits per missile (207,000 NSD, at 1 Valentian Credits = 2.07 NationStates Dollars).
Reusablility: Yes, but due to the impact and force of the landings, it's good for 100 uses before it gets horribly inaccurate with its landings. Dismantling and Recycling guide provided.

** The message is pre-designated of the form "[YOUR NATION NAME] would like to negotiate with you peacefully!", with only the name being customisable. For example, "Valentine Z would like to negotiate with you peacefully!"

*** We are NOT responsible for deaths that are caused by missile landings. It is meant to be free of explosions, chemical, or biological hazards, but the nature and location of the landing is still your responsibility. Make sure that the area is clear before launching.

**** We strongly DISCOURAGE retrofitting it with explosives, chemicals, or biological hazards. The hidden onboard sensors and spectrometers will know when it has these items inside the missile.

Order form:
[code]
Nation Name:
Purchasing Contractor / Organisation:
Name of Representative (if any):
Purchase Quantity:
Nation Name to be Displayed on Message:
[/code]

Purchase Ledger:

Nation Name / OOC, Long Form

Nation Name / IC

Purchasing Contractor / Organisation

Name of Representative (if any)

Purchase Quantity

NSD Overall Cost

Nation Name to be Displayed on Message

Al-hind indus

Al-Hind Indus

Royal Indusian Airforce

Al Mansoor

20

NSD 4,140,000.00

Al-Hind Indus

The Strawberry Queendom of Autumns

Autumns

The State

Bang Mei-Zhen

10

NSD 2,070,000.00

The Excelsior

Chethel

Chethel

Chethel Homeguard

Sev Spacey

40

NSD 8,280,000.00

Empire of Chethel

The Servitor of the Outer Gods of Chill beats LLC

Chill Beats Radio, LLC

Chill Beats Radio, LLC

DJ Doug, station manager

1

NSD 207,000.00

CHILL BEATS RADIO LLC

Cordrazine collective

Cordrazine Collective

Cordrazine Pacification Agency

Zafonia

100

NSD 20,700,000.00

Cordrazine Collective

The Community of East Apikai

Free Republic of Apikai

Apikaian League for Preservation of Life

Jimmy Doe

1

NSD 207,000.00

The Free Republic of Apikai

The Great State of of Granluras

Granluras

Ministry of Defence

Anonymous

5

NSD 1,035,000.00

Granluras

The I don't know of Hammer Britannia

Hammer Britannia

Dandi

Dandi

50

NSD 10,350,000.00

Hammer Britannia

The Federal Republic of Klaathu

Federal Republic of Klaathu

KAL's Junkyard LLC (Does aerospace and missile contracts for the government)

President Jebediah Kerman

50

NSD 10,350,000.00

Federal Republic of Klaathu

The Confederal Alliance of Pilarcraft

Confederal Alliance of Pilarcraft

Confederal Remnants

Chief Lawbringer Astrid Hoag

20000

NSD 4,140,000,000.00

The Alliance to restore the Federation

The New Soviet Union of Rusthenia

Rusthenia

Rusthenian Strategic Rocket Forces

Anag Khachatourian

50

NSD 10,350,000.00

Democratic Free Polish State

The North Atlantic Settlement of The Rapture Republic

The Rapture Republic

Colombian Arms

Mister Zero

800

NSD 165,600,000.00

(Assume same as IC Nation Name, given the "Yes.")

The Unholy Red Socialissimo of The South Falls

The South Falls

Dacofoc Arms SODC (State-Owned Defense Company)

Nadezhda Storrovna

1350

NSD 279,450,000.00

The South Fallsian Government

The United States of Undarat

Undarat

Undarat Defense Forces

Justin Westlake

5

NSD 1,035,000.00

Undarat

The United States of Undarat

Undarat

Undarat Defense Forces

Justin Westlake

100

NSD 20,700,000.00

Undarat

The United States of Undarat

Undarat

Undarat Defense Forces

Justin Westlake

50

NSD 10,350,000.00

Undarat

The Realm of Yohannes

Yohannes

Alleswerken AG

Hannah McLaughlin

100

NSD 20,700,000.00

Yohannes

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