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Hell's Bells Issue XVII: Beat The Devil's Tattoo (Black Hawks' Plot Revealed)

Ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee.

May 31st, 2016
Issue XVII. LinkBeat The Devil's Tattoo

I. The Demon Hawks
II. Spotlight News:
- Hell Freezes over, gets Commended!?
III. Ask Fredd!
IV. The Hellfire Club
V. Artwork of the Damned
VI. Counter-Productive Issues

The Demon Hawks
Article by, The Stalker

A plot by The Black Hawks to raid Hell for the upcoming RaiderCon event had been known by the Mad King for some time. A scheme stretching back roughly a year, the idea born during last RaiderCon to raid Hell for the challenge, the esteem, to try and dethrone the confident King. Throughout the year they began to sneak in nations one by one, a handful of devoted sleepers spent months just to get in, and months more waiting for an opportunity that would never come.

Months and months were spent endorsing and supporting the Mad King. Writing articles, becoming real members of the region on many levels. See the King has known for some time some of the trial nations where likely sleepers.

So long as the number of Hell Elders and Stalker loyalists outnumbered those who earned their passage from Underworld, an internal shift would be impossible. Balanced growth has always been the key, and the King is a master of numbers. This method makes raiders a helpful resource rather than a hindrance, putting the infiltration attempts of invaders to work for you.

Today we honor their efforts, both for their boldness and for their service to the inferno. Truly you guys have helped in the cultural development of Hell, increased our endorsement count and influence growth, and Hell thanks you. For this, I dub thee the Demon Hawks! You are all forever welcome in Underworld.

Former nation and known sleeper Nazgur spent from August 12th 2015 till giving up in February 21st 2016, and a few months more in Underworld, nearly 8 months of WA support for Hell instead of raiding.

Zen beatitudes would serve Hell from October 2015 till April 2016 when the Predator punishments ejected them from the WA, 6 months of WA support, along with authoring articles for Hell's Bells.

Another known Underworld sleeper Assanria would author a few articles for Hell's Bells before being deleted during the Predator puppet sweep.

Azazal, would serve from mid January till mid May, 4 months of WA support and more in Underworld.

The terran states, would serve from mid January till mid May, 4 months of WA support and more in Underworld.

Nivagard, would serve from March till mid May, 2 months of WA support and more in Underworld.

The mission would ultimately be called off mid May 2016 when it was clear Hell couldn't be taken. Probes for raiders within the region and a timely merger with ones of Hell's allies would be the final straws to end the Hawk's campaign.

Hell has faced some of the best NationStates has to offer and stands stronger for it. So to all the would be raiders of Hell, know this, you can try, I invite you to try, but in the end you will serve Hell like all those before you.

Never underestimate the King of Hell, darling.

Spotlight News
Compiled by, The Stalker

Hell Freezes over, gets Commended!?

Befitting the Hell frozen over theme taken up for the month of May, Hell was the surprising target for a World Assembly Commending. A resolution posted on Friday the 13th by Yokiria, aka Ridersyl, to Commend Hell hit the voting floor May 22nd. It would amount to a very close race for the bulk of the voting period.

Ultimately passing 9,673 (54%) For and 8,303 (46%) Against.

Hell would like to Linksincerely thank all those who voted for this, and Ridersyl for his efforts as author, you all have our sincere gratitude and it won't be forgotten. We really got a lot of unexpected support and it is truly an honor to have our region so recognized, we thank you all.
(Hell's Bells welcome submissions for future Spotlight News articles, contact The Stalker for details.)

Ask Fredd!
Advice Column by, Freddland

Dear Fredd,

Hell has Frozen over and been Commended by the World Assembly, surely these are both signs of the apocalypse!? Is the end near? Are we all doomed? What does it all mean!?

A Cold Guy


Cold Dude,
Hell freezing over is part of the global warming conspiracy. They siphoned all of the heat from Hell to warm up the Earth. They are fiendish bastards, whoever they are.

The Commendation is also a conspiracy to make us relax and let our guard down. CONSTANT VIGILANCE!!!!

Who stole my tinfoil hat? Must be those environmentalist, transgender feminazis. DAMN THEM!!!

Have a question for Fredd you'd like to see answered in the next issue of Hell's Bells? Submit here via telegram to Freddland.

The Hellfire Club
Article by, Laveyan inferno

“Do what thou wilt". This simple, yet powerful and revolutionary edict adorned the building that hosted the infamous Hellfire Club. The motto would again appear in Allister Crowley’s Law of Thelema, and it now stands as a symbolic commandment for those who pursue the principles of the Left-Hand Path. Composed of elites and rakes of English society, the Hellfire Club hosted a variety of libertine and taboo activities that gained it much notoriety, and earned it its name from critics. A world entirely of its own, the club was not only a den of debauchery, but served as a sanctuary for the blooming ideas of the Enlightenment Age. There are also indications that several members, including its founder, aspired for a revival of pagan culture and practices. Although much is uncertain about the exploits of this secretive and exclusive club, it is clear that it has served as a philosophical model and inspiration for later organizations of similar intent, such as the more recent Church of Satan.

The gentleman behind the inception of the Hellfire Club was none other than the prominent Sir Francis Dashwood (Topham). Little is known about his upbringing, other than that he was born into an extremely wealthy family and was educated at Eton University. Afterwards, Sir Francis moved on to become a politician by day and exercised insatiable hedonism as a rake by night. He achieved a highly respectable political career, holding positions as a Parliament Member, the Treasurer of the Chamber, Exchequer, and Postmaster General within the British government (Kemp). His strong passion for travel was evident, as he went on “Grand Tours” all over Europe. It was during his travel through Italy that he developed a strong distain for the Catholic Church and its rigid doctrines. This deep seated hatred would later motivate him to form a leisurely organization centered on the pursuit of indulgence and the mockery of Christianity.

He officially established the order in 1746 under the name of the ‘Knights of St. Francis,” more than likely a cheeky jab at the system of chivalry formerly exercised by the Church. The dubbing of the more recognized name “Hellfire Club” would later originate from his critics as an attempted insult, referencing to a previous club under the same name that was active from 1719 to 1721 (Topham). Initially starting out as a small gathering of members in the “George and Vulture” public house in London, the Hellfire Club grew in popularity and prominence, warranting the need for a more lavish, secluded space in which to meet (Topham). Sir Francis decided it would be fitting to relocate to Medmenham, formerly an abbey for the Cistercian religious order during the thirteenth century, long since abandoned (Topham). He probably chose this location not only out of personal convenience, as it was relatively close to his estate in West Wycombe, but also due to its religious significance. The dark comedian that he was, he likely viewed with sardonic pleasure the moving of his earthy and unholy order of “knights” onto sacred ground as an act of desecration.

The domain of the Hellfire Club chosen, Sir Francis faced the laborious task of refurbishing the dilapidated ruins of Medmenham. He wanted not only a mere meeting place, but a great pleasure palace of incredible finery, excess, and a cultic aura , where the true extent of the club’s potential could be realized. To help him accomplish this great undertaking was architect Nicholas Revett (‘The Hell-Fire Caves). Drawing greatly from the Neo-Classical and Gothic styles, the abbey was redecorated with such additions as arches, a tower, stain glass windows, and fresco paintings garnishing the ceilings (“The Hell-Fire Caves”). Of all such improvements to the abbey, perhaps the most significant of these was the Hell-Fire Caves. A grand entrance in the form of a Gothic Cathedral would welcome the members into a long winding passage covered in carvings and engravings. Within this cave was a Banqueting Hall, various chambers and even an Inner Temple, where Sir Francis and his knights were said to have performed rituals (“The Hell-Fire Caves”).

In fact, there was a chamber dedicated to the U.S. founding father Benjamin Franklin, who was a close friend of Sir Francis and who was an active participant in many of the club’s activities during his time in England. He spoke fondly of the Hellfire Club and of Sir Francis in a letter to his son, stating:

"l am in this House as much at my Ease as if it was my own, and the Gardens are a Paradise. But a pleasanter Thing is the kind Countenance, the facetious and very intelligent conversation of mine Host, who having been for many Years engaged in public Affairs, seen all Parts of Europe, and kept the best Company in the World is himself the best existing:" (“The Hell-Fire Caves”). And, from what is known about what went on in the depths of the infernal grotto, what a hell of a time he surely had!

Hellfire Club meetings were conducted twice every year, and are best described in the 1779 book Nocturnal Revels:

'They however always meet in one general sett at meals, when, for the improvement of mirth, pleasantry, and gaiety, every member is allowed to introduce a Lady of cheerful lively disposition, to improve the general hilarity. Male visitors are also permitted, under certain restrictions, their greatest recommendation being their merit wit and humour. There is no constraint with regard to the circulation of the glass, after some particular toasts have been given: The Ladies, in the intervals of their repasts, may make select parties among themselves, or entertain one another, or alone with reading, musick, tambour-work, etc. The salt of these festivities is generally purely attic, but no indelicacy or indecency is allowed to be intruded without a severe penalty; and a jeu de mots must not border too much upon a loose double entendre to be received with applause” (“The Hell-Fire Caves”).

Indeed, the club did engage in many indulgent, and often taboo, vices: fine wining and dining, gambling, and carnality with mistresses, to name a few. The members also partook in the arts, as is evidenced by various musical instruments and books on numerous subjects found within the chapter room (Topham). Most interestingly, Dashwood and several other members had apparently dabbled in various aspects of pagan ritualism, often mistaken for and misconstrued as genuine Satan worship.

Dashwood, being an avid student of ancient religions, seemed to hold a particularly strong reverence for the Roman goddess Venus. Statues of the deity of love and beauty can be found throughout Medmenham, and a painting of Sir Francis depicts him venerating the goddess in religious garments (Topham). Therefore, along with the conventional mock rituals that were merely meant to poke fun at Christianity, there may have indeed been some form of pagan worship in respect to the goddess. It would make sense that Sir Francis would focus explicitly on Venus, since she represented the emotion of lust which was quite prevalent within the ranks of the club, especially with its leader. Also, she signified a more artistic, intellectual side of the club, which held literature and the arts and how they, like a mirror, reflected the immaculate splendor of nature, in high regard.

The Hellfire Club, with its rampant infamy and often mistaken intentions, achieved a stunning accomplishment: freedom from the chains of Abrahamic suppression. The gentlemen of the Enlightenment Era within it, through their will and determination to live to the fullest, spit a seething flame in the face of god, and created for themselves a superior reality, if but for a brief moment in time. They stand as an inspiration to all who seek liberation from the mental prison of conformity: Satanist, Luciferian, Pagan, Witch, Thelemite, and Wiccan alike.

For more information on this fascinating group of daring deviants and its eccentric founder, I recommend the websites listed in the bibliography below.

With Promethean Flame, Hail Satan!


Bloy, Marjie. "The 'Hell Fire Club'" The 'Hell Fire Club' Web. 18 May 2016.

Kemp, Betty. "History of Parliament Online." DASHWOOD, Sir Francis, 2nd Bt. (1708-81), of West Wycombe, Bucks. Web. 16 May 2016.

"The Hellfire Caves." The Hellfire Caves. Web. 18 May 2016.

Topham, Ian, and Alison Topham. "The Hellfire Club." Mysterious Britain & Ireland. Web. 16 May 2016.

Artwork of the Damned
"Fear and Loathing"
40x30 Oil Painting by, The Stalker

Article by, Buer the demon AKA Dr George

For this article, I’m going to be addressing a very specific way of answering issues: I am assuming you are at least an intermediate-level player with a good grasp of the issues; that you already have good Civil Rights and Political Freedoms and want both to go even higher; and that Economy, Economic Freedom, and Freedom from Taxation (i.e., lower taxes), and good environment are of secondary importance to you.

Ever since we were given the information on how our answers impact our nations, I have been dismayed at the large number of issues that have vastly more negative consequences than they do positive ones. In some cases, there are three times or more falling statistics than there are positive ones! If course, not all positives are good to most people, say Primitiveness, and not all negatives are bad, like Tax Rate.

So, over the past several days, I have assembled a list of the issues I’ve encountered that either do the opposite of what they were claiming or have more negative outcomes than positive ones. In some of these, the issue in question lowers Civil Rights or Political Freedoms, even when choosing the nominal high freedom choice.

I am guessing most readers will have one or more additional rankings that they would like to increase, even at the expense of others, say Cultured. Perhaps some of the following issues have overall negative consequences, but also happens to include a rise in Cultured, so you may choose it anyway.

I have deliberately excluded those issues whose primary aim is to lower taxes. Almost by definition, lowering taxes is going to include perhaps some very deep cuts in some areas as well as more modest cuts in other areas, so they will naturally have negative consequences outnumbering the positive ones.

One should take into account the variation of change. If issue XXX raises, say, Civil Rights, by 20% and lowers ten other things by .05%, you would do well to answer that issue, as the benefits vastly outweigh the consequences. Here are my (admittedly subjective) views on percentage change:

Change<1%: trivial
Change=1-5%: can be meaningful, especially in conjunction with an overall trend in the same direction
Change=5-10%: meaningful (especially as you rise in world rankings)
Change=10-100%: WAY significant
Change=100-1,000%: WOW
Change>1,000%: WOW WOW WOW!!!
To date, the highest percentage change I have noticed was 144,000%!

So, without further ado, here is a short list of issues I would dismiss if I were pro-CR, pro-PF, and secondarily pro-Econ, pro-Econ Freedom, pro-environment, and pro-Freedom from Taxation, based on choices that seem to favour high freedoms (I may update this list as I go through more of the issues):

16 (BOTH)
347 (CHOOSE #2, NOT #3)

We hope you've enjoyed our Seventeenth issue of Hell's Bells. Nations interested in contributing to future issues should contact The Stalker for details.

Important Note: In payment for having enjoyed our Newspaper you are expected to up arrow this factbook. Failing to up arrow this factbook means you are willing choosing to forfeit ownership of your soul to The Stalker for all eternity instead. Thanks for reading.