Details on my NS Forum Signature

So you click the button to read more about my NS signature. Why did you click it? Don't ask me; you did it. You consider going back to what you were doing on the NS forum but decide to continue reading this factbook.

"Let's hear about the signature," you tell yourself silently, "I've already wasted enough time here."

"What! How did it know what I was thinking?" you sit up in your chair in alarm. "That's enough of this nonsense. Blah blah blah. You don't know what I'm saying. You can't! How can you?! Stop! I'm going to leave this page if you don't stop this right now."

Ok, let me interrupt your rude rampage. It's time to discuss my signature now. After all, that was the subject of this factbook before you sidetracked us.

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[spoiler=MM-DD-YY NEWS][/spoiler]
[b]The first button[/b] you come across in my signature is the latest tidbit of news I want to let the world of NS know about. The last updated date is listed in the button title so you immediately know if I have something new to share.

[spoiler=MM-DD Whats up][/spoiler]
[b]The second button[/b] you set your eyes on is the latest thing in the NS forum I'm working on. This also contains the date for easy update notices. (Yes, I know it's spelled "What's up" but I can't put an apostrophe in the spoiler.)

[spoiler=MM-DD {DEF} How can I help][/spoiler]
And finally [b]the third button[/b] let's you know what you can do to help such as approving a WA proposal draft. It's default status (abbreviated "DEF") is set to: Prolife? Consider joining [region]Right to Life[/region], one of the 100 largest regions of NS

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"What a great signature idea," you tell yourself. "This Ovybia guy is really quite interesting. I wish I knew more about him."

What would you like to know?

"No! Stop! You can't hear me...but I am curious, what was your previous signature?"

[size=200] [/size]
[hr][size=150][i]Enter the Time Museum[/i][/size]
[hr]
Here, written in antiquated computer lingo, lies the only known preserved form of Ovybia's first NS forum signature:
[box][u][color=red]Psychological Health Warning:[/color][/u] Many people have reported strong feelings of anger, irritation, and annoyance after reading Ovybia's politically incorrect posts. We apologize for this inconvenience. If you are experiencing these or other related symptoms, we recommend taking a glass of water and contacting your keyboard immediately with your fingers, as these actions usually help relieve the pain. If the pain is not alleviated within 2-4 minutes, as a last resort, one could always become logical.
[i]The preceding prescriptions were carefully selected by experts after extensive research; the prescriptions mentioned have been proven to present the highest possible cure to death ratio.[/i][/box]

To see my signature as it is now, [url=https://forum.nationstates.net/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&u=693748]click here and scroll down to "Signature"[/url].

Thank you for reading. Telegram me with questions, comments, or criticisms on just about anything.

[b]EDIT:[/b] Are people seriously disliking this? It's such a unique idea that w--
"No no no," you interrupt, "I hit the dislike button because..."
Why don't you send me a tg explaining it?
"I would but I don't have the time."
If you are going to dislike this, send me a tg on how to improve it. It's a common courtesy.
"Well, umm, but..."