Hell's Bells Issue XI: No room in Hell

Ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee.

October 25th, 2015
Issue XI. No room in Hell

Index
I. The Resurrection of Zombieland
II. Spotlight News: Villains & SAMHAIN
III. Ask Fredd!
IV. The Path of the Satanist: A Journey of Self
V. Artwork of the Damned
VI. Halloween Edition: Zombies

The Resurrection of Zombieland
Article by, The Stalker AKA Mr Zombie

When there is no more room in Hell... the dead shall walk the earth...

The Nationstate's Devil, The Stalker, has officially declared there's no more room in Hell. Henceforth the gates of Hell will forever remain closed, all damned souls will be return to sender. Which of course as we all know results in the dead rising to eat your precious brains.

Yes! It's that time again my friends, the Zombie Apocalypse draws near, the familiar moans and snarls of the undead can be heard in the distance. The infamous Pro-Zombie region Zombieland once against returns for its third year to terrorize Nationstates' unsuspecting regions with Zombies! Now sponsored as an official territory of The Kingdom of Hell.

Many remember Zombieland from prior years, the region spiking up to well over 100+ nations with several dozen more coming and going throughout Z day. Organized and disorganized group attacks on dozens of regions and this year we aim to do even more! We invite all Zombie enthusiast to send on over your Zombie nations to Zombieland for the festivities! It's time to revive your old zombie puppets, and to make several new ones!

Zombieland Pledge
We the zombies of Zombieland, in order to form a more perfect flesh eating society, to spread the infection, insure brains for all our hungry, provide for the common Zombie, promote the Zombie way, and ensure the blessings of the infection is spread so all may know our posterity, do ordain the Zombification of Nationstates. We're coming to get you Barbara!

Doom will soon fall upon all of Nationstates! The day of reckoning fast approaches, where the meatbags shall join the Zombie hordes or be savagely devoured! You all have this one chance to join us now, or in our bellies tomorrow! For months we've been preparing, setting up undercover Zombie nations throughout all of NS. No region is safe, no password will keep us out, for we are legion. We shall spread the infection to all corners of NS, we will ensure NS falls to the impending Zombie Apocalypse! NO ONE IS SAFE.

Zombieland Z day Protocol:

Zombieland Z Day Protocol

by The Zombie Corporation of Mr Zombie

Welcome to Zombieland, the most contagious region around!

~Zombie Radio~

As Mayor Zombie I personally welcome you to Zombieland, things are going to get crazy come Z day, so here are some helpful pro-Zombie tips and outline of our regional customs.

I. Begin Exporting Zombies ASAP. Ideally you're gonna wanna be online for Z day as close to the start as possible, and begin exporting Zombies as soon as possible. The more infected you become and the larger your Zombie population is, the greater your Zombie attack becomes.

II. Infect your fellow Zombie residents! We wanna get Zombieland as infectious as possible, as soon as possible. You are highly encouraged to go around further infecting your neighbors and in turn others will infect you back, creating a cycle of infection!

III. DO NOT TRY TO CURE OUR RESIDENTS! Anyone caught researching the cure or sending cure missile will be banjected on sight, no acceptations. If you see anyone doing this report them to Mr Zombie immediately.

IV. It is customary to to infect any and all incoming nations. Many nations come and go from Zombieland over the course of Z day, often returning to Zombieland to further infect their population or when their nation gets hit with "Cure" missiles. Infecting them upon return is our way of saying welcome back and helping further the spread of the infection.

V. Everyone leads the hoard in Zombieland! Anyone and everyone is welcome and encouraged to suggest targets for our hoards to attack. Just post on our regional message board a region you wanna attack, and our Zombie comrades will send a few attacks their way. When you see someone else posting a possible target, be sure to swing by that region yourself, remember this is a team effort!

VI. Know a region's password or regional code? Post it! On Z day many regions close their boarders with a password or security code. If you figure out a region's password or code, share it with the hoard! We shall not be kept out! As Z day progresses I will be adding known passwords and regional codes to this or another dispatch for residents to easily access.

VII. You can attack with multiple nations at a time!! Yes what many people don't realize is, you can log into one nation per internet browser.

The three main ones being:
Google Chrome
Internet Explorer
Mozilla Firefox

Log into a different nation on each one, line them up side by side on your screen and you can rotate between the three. While one is cool downing down, you can attack with another. Hammering away with three or more nations will greatly increase your effectiveness in spreading the gift of Zombism.

VIII. For more Z day fun check out the NS forum! Zombie Emergency Command Center

2014 Z day threads

Zombieland Thread
•Page 1: Zombieland Declares War on the Humans! Join us or BE EATEN!
•Page 2: 10 Days till infection. I'm gonna eat your face off Interview
•Page 3: We the Zombies of Zombieland, Constitution: 6 Days...

Additional Pro-Zombie Threads
•The Pro-Zombie Offensive

(Footnote: If you like what you've read, please be sure to up arrow this dispatch in the top right corner.)

Read factbook

"I can't profess to understand God's plan, Christ promised the resurrection of the dead. I just thought he had something a little different in mind."
~Hershel (TWD)

Spotlight News
Compiled by, The Stalker

Villains take over the Madhouse!
Spotlight Article by, The Stalker

HA HA HA! Ladies and murderers, welcome to the madhouse! Life's a bowl of cherries and this is the pits.
Nationstates deserves a better class of criminal. And we’re gonna give it to them.
Madness, as you know, is a lot like gravity, all it takes is a little push.

We shall be a curse upon NS

The Joker: The Stalker
Ra's al Ghul: Big jim p
Penguin: Freddland
Scarecrow: Cynical Alcoholics
Deathstroke: War-salvaged soldiers
Two-Face: Sabana santa
Mr. Freeze: Boolaroo
Killer Croc: Mc johnny
Black Mask: Donkervader
The Riddler: Domination republic
Catwoman: Vampiremountain
Victor Zsasz: Sasbaaddon
Bane: Theistic luciferia
Deadshot: Galactic russian empire
Hugo Strange: Ioniac
The Mad Hatter: Buer the demon
Solomon Grundy: Nazgur
Harley Quinn: Zombie fascists

(Name links to origin story)
Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

SAMHAIN: Origin of Halloween
Spotlight Article by, Theistic luciferia

A Lot of People in modern times celebrate Halloween, or as it was called by Catholics in the Middle Ages, Hallowmas. It was a festival of fear. It was believed that on Hallowmas, the Gates of Hell would be opened and Evil was free to roam the earth for that day. In Fear, People Would Dress as Ghosts and Demons and Ghouls and such to blend in with the evils they believed were roaming the streets among them. It is funny to think such a fun tradition came from such a time of fear, but the origins of Halloween were not with the Catholic Hallowmas, but with the Celtic Samhain. Samhain was a festival associated with the end of the harvest season and the beginning of Winter or the darker half of the year. The name Samhain is derived from the Gaelic word for November as it was celebrated from sunset on October 31st to Sunset on November 01st. Many parts of the festival include Bonfires, Guising, Mumming, Divinations and Large Feasts. When Christian Missionaries arrived in the Celtic Lands they witnessed this festival and declared it to be an abomination. Hence the Christian Church did what they always did to try to convert the Celts by force. They outright banned the Celebration of Samhain, and when they caught Celts Celebrating it in their Homes, the Church made a decision to mask Samhain with a Holiday of Fear. This tactic led to the brainwashing of younger generations and the eventual forced conversion of The Celtic People. Ever since, the festival has been associated with dark spirits up until about the late 19th century when there was a revival of the no longer observed holiday. Rather than reviving a festival of Fear alone, the Revival incorporated a sort of traditional dress-up day in which people would dress up and go about their cities and towns celebrating with their neighbors. In the early 20th century with the onset of the Industrial era, and eventual commercialization of the Candy companies, the push to center the holiday on Going door to door for candy was eventually introduced.

Indeed, Halloween is nothing like it started out as. It is yet another holiday distorted by Christians and Killed by Commercialization.

(Hell's Bells welcome submissions for future Spotlight News articles, contact The Stalker for details.)

Ask Fredd!
Advice Column by, Freddland

Dear Fredd,

My roommate stole what I was planning to eat after work. It was a delicious sandwich from the heavens with turkey, bacon, ham, lettuces, and everything yummy on top. What should I do?

Sincerely,
Hungry

Hungry,
Seems simple enough. Your roommate ate what you were planning to eat. So eat him instead. There's was a great cooking show about how to prepare him. It's called 'Silence of the Lambs'. Give it a looksie. Bon appetit.

Fredd
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Have a question for Fredd you'd like to see answered in the next issue of Hell's Bells? Submit here via telegram to Freddland.

The Path of the Satanist:
A Journey of Self
Written by: Magus Samael
With contributions from Imperator Ragnarsson

Artist: Pavel Maksimoff / mpv666

Quintessentially, LaVeyan Satanism sets the individual self at the highest precedent. This precept is among the most eminent philosophical tenets that comprise of our philosophy. As a cultivated seed gives bloom to a radiant flower, so does Satanism aim to take those who are willing and able, and help them to develop into more independent and distinguished individuals. To declare yourself a Satanist is to make a commitment to improve upon your talents and strengths, as well as to attempt to remove that from your life which hinders your development as a human being. The largest of such obstacles are the superstitious dogmas that govern the minds and whims of many people. One such lie that you must cast away from yourself is the existence of a higher being.

To recognize yourself as a Satanist, the first and most important step is recognizing that you are your own master, and hence responsible for your own actions. There is no single god or pantheon omnipotent despotic pantheon of deities above to judge your actions, approve of your so called “good deeds”, or make excuses for your what Judeo-Christian morality deems diabolical or malevolent behavior. We eschew this overly-simplistic good-evil dichotomy. Since there are multitudinous variations of morality codes formulated throughout human existence, there can be with no fundamental absolutes. Therefore, we Satanists are moral relativists and morality is contingent upon one’s own philosophical ruminations and independent virtues.

For centuries our ancestors believed that the essence of the human condition transcended the mortal plane to inhabit a spiritual realm in one form or another. This is not so, for as we have grown in knowledge of anatomy and biology, we have learned that who we are as individuals is defined by our sentience evolutionarily developed by our carnal brains. Emotions, which were once thought to reside within the heart, are merely chemical reactions as a response to various genetic and environmental stimuli. This is not to say that they are any less important, for Satanists value to beauty of human emotions greatly. On the contrary, the fact that human personality only lasts a moment in the long expanse of the universe makes it that much more valuable. Life is to be cherished and savored for its brevity, and to realize that there is nothing beyond the existence we have now should be a prime motivator to get the most out of each and every day we are so fortunate to experience. For death is the ultimate fate of all, and the great abstinence. To deprive one’s self of the pleasures and joys that life has to offer, especially in this modern age of advanced technology and social advancement on a scale the likes of which have never been seen before, is not only foolish, but wasteful.

We Satanists strive to avoid such denial, and instead hope to die satisfied, accomplishing all of life’s goals, and leaving behind a legacy of memories for others to reminisce on. Heaven and Hell, as well as all other dichotomous reward and punishment systems within religion, are manifestations of the two primal physical sensations within all sentient life, pleasure and pain. Heaven and hell inhibit the mortal plain, and can be experienced daily. The trick in which one you experience more is in most cases up to you. By choosing your own destiny, you decide whether or not your life is a paradise or a raging inferno. As is stated in the Satanic Statements our manifesto, the Satanic Bible, “Satan represents responsibility to the responsible,” and there is a mandate for all practitioners of this path to take charge in their lives in order to improve them. The Satanist, in essence, aims to be his or her own god: Self-deification. Rather, it is an idealistic goal, a vision if you will, of what you would like to be or what you wish to achieve. To ascend to the status of a “god” or “goddess” in human form, therefore, is to achieve all of life’s aspirations and to fulfill ones desires. To emancipate one’s self from the constraints and standards imposed by others, and to instead live according to one’s own will. It is, finally and most importantly, to live with the comfort and knowledge that you are your own judge, and that you are free from the clutches of the deities that control and infect the thoughts of the masses.

While we are on the subject of nonexistent, supposedly higher beings, I have a disclaimer to the unacquainted. We Satanists, apart from the Theistic form, do not worship the devil or any other deity. Those of us who are LaVeyan Satanists acknowledge Satan not as an anthropomorphic being, but as an archetype, a pinnacle of human achievement to be revered rather than worshiped directly. Satan, as is known in Christian lore is seen as the adversary, and other times the bringer of the enlightenment, hence the other name, Lucifer, which translates to “bringer of light” in Latin. He is strong and influential enough to challenge the status quo, and gathers to him an army of rebels from among the Christian god’s ranks.

He is the emblematic of our rebellion as individuals. This is not a revolt in the sense of the edgy stereotype often portrayed by heavy metal fans. It is rather an intellectual and philosophical insurgence, a rejection not only of the Judeo-Christian religions of the western world, but also a denunciation of Judeo-Christian morality, or the guiding principles that have swayed mainstream culture and thought. There are many examples of such influences in society, including obligatory altruism, mercy to those who don’t deserve it, and the ‘golden rule’. They confine the human condition to a psychological bubble, an allegorical prison cell of subjective good and evil made objective.

In regard to clemency, the first person you must please and serve before all else is yourself. For if we are not good to ourselves, how can we possibly hope to be good to others? Beyond yourself, extend your assistance to those few whom you trust and respect, primarily your family and friends. To squander ones care and concern on the strangers of the world is to devalue the worth of compassion, and dilute its rich flavor with the bland water of self-righteousness.

The idea of mercy and of turning the other cheek, as has been commanded fervently in the scriptures by Jesus, or as we Satanists have dubbed him, the “mad redeemer”, is a perversion of human nature. It takes the idea of self-preservation, and turns it on its head, so that all of the loyal sheep of the shepherd can follow suit and suffer needlessly like their hero. We Satanists must choose otherwise if we are to thrive. As has been stated well by Anton LaVey in the Book of Satan, Chapter 3, “"Love one another" it has been said is the supreme law, but what power made it so? Upon what rational authority does the gospel of love rest? Why should I not hate mine enemies - if I "love" them does that not place me at their mercy? Is it natural for enemies to do good unto each other - and what is good? Can the torn and bloody victim "love" the blood-splashed jaws that rend him limb from limb? Are we not all predatory animals by instinct? If humans ceased wholly from preying upon each other, could they continue to exist? Is not "lust and carnal desire" a more truthful term to describe "love" when applied to the continuance of the race? Is not the "love" of the fawning scriptures simply a euphemism for sexual activity, or was the "great teacher" a glorifier of eunuchs? Love your enemies and do good to them that hate and use you - is this not the despicable philosophy of the spaniel that rolls upon its back when kicked? Hate your enemies with a whole heart, and if a man smite you on one cheek, smash him on the other!; smite him hip and thigh, for self-preservation is the highest law! He who turns the other cheek is a cowardly dog! Give blow for blow, scorn for scorn, doom for doom - with compound interest liberally added thereunto! Eye for eye, tooth for tooth, aye four-fold, a hundred-fold! Make yourself a Terror to your adversary, and when he goeth his way, he will possess much additional wisdom to ruminate over. Thus shall you make yourself respected in all the walks of life, and your spirit - your immortal spirit - shall live, not in an
intangible paradise, but in the brains and sinews of those whose respect you have
gained.” In short, do not be afraid to stand up for yourself. If someone chooses to mock and slander you, speak out against such ignorance. If you are attacked physically, push right back in defiance. Stand strong against your adversaries, and do not allow them to belittle you. Continue to do well in what you are good at, and your success will put them to shame.
In conclusion, the path of the Satanist is one of self-fulfillment and liberation. It’s about reaching one's highest potential and getting the most out of life. As our philosophy becomes more widely recognized and understood, more people will align themselves with our philosophy.
I have just given you a relatively brief summary of some of the basic principles of Satanism. I hope it has enlightened you as to what we are all about, and that you have gained a greater perspective on the true meaning of Satan. If you have any questions for me or other members of the Satanic Cathedral, feel free to telegram us or leave a message in our discussion forum. Thank you very much for your time. Hail Satan!
Sources: LaVey, Anton Szandor. The Satanic Bible. New York: Avon, 1969. Print.
Contact Links:
Magus Samael of LaVeyan Inferno: Laveyan inferno
The Satanic Cathedral

Artwork of the Damned
"Some of us will never sleep again; Zombie"
14x11 Oil Painting by, The Stalker

Halloween Edition: Zombies
Article by, Buer the demon AKA Dr george

Regarding the Zombie Apocalypse in this game-within-a-game, as of last year, there are three basic approaches (there's no guarantee this year will be exactly the same):

(1) Cure the Zombies;
(2) Kill the Zombies; and
(3) Join the Zombies.

If you decide on option 1, you will tell NS that your nation is "researching a cure." After about an hour, your nation will start building Cure Missiles which you can fire at other nations in the region. Once a nation is Zombie-free, it tends to stay that way unless it has chosen option 3, or someone else who has chosen option 3 re-infects it.

If you decide on option 2, you will develop roving death squads that turn Zombies into dead people. As above, you can send your death squads into other nations in the region to kill their Zombies, too.

If you decide on option 3, you will become very infected very quickly. After an hour or so, you will be able to infect your neighbours or go to other regions and "spread the wealth."

If you want to survive the ZA and emerge infection-free (highest score), here's the plan:

I. At the beginning of the crisis, have the Founder temporarily close your region's borders to keep out unwanted "guests."
II. I strongly suggest EVERYONE in your region research the cure. The point of the game is to have the most survivors, so dead people don't count.
III. Anyone who wants to join the zombies should voluntarily leave the region or be temporarily ejected for the duration of the crisis.
IV. Particularly at the beginning, when your Cure Missiles are weakest, target the largest nations first--your first few missile strikes will go a surprisingly long way with those nations with 20,000,000,000+ populations.
V. As the largest nations become zombie-free, turn your attention to other nations, especially apparently inactive ones. Your missiles will be getting stronger, so it won't be QUITE so tedious to rid medium and smaller nations of Zombies. If you leave even a few million Zombies, they will start multiplying again, so be sure the nation you're curing goes completely infection-free!
VI. It takes a minute or so between missile shots, so I advocate that you have 2 or 3 nations (or more if you're really efficient or have someone helping you) online at the same time with different browsers. You might have nation W on Chrome, X on Opera, Y on MSIE, and Z on Safari. Once you fire one missile, immediately switch to the next nation and so forth. By the time you've used your last browser, the first one will be ready to go again!
VII. Be aware that when a nation is hit with any of the three approaches, it cannot do anything for 60-90 seconds, so if you see nations being very active, don't strike them at first. Wait until they stop firing before curing them.
VIII. Perhaps you and 1-2 friends can tag-team a particular nation at a time, continuously bombarding it with cure missiles--it will become infection-free MUCH faster that way.
IX. As the night wears on, network with other awake nations to find any obscure nations with remaining infection.
X. Report any "Join Zombie" nations for ejection.
XI. Once the region is completely infection free (usually the next day), you might consider voluntarily leaving your region to help out some other region, which will be deeply appreciated. Be sure you return to your home base before the end of the crisis so your population counts in the scoring.
XII. Even if you don't plan to stay up at all late, still be sure to research the cure in the first hour of the crisis, so you can at least heal yourself. STARTING EARLY IS KEY. If you wait until 99% of your population is zombified or dead, you won't have any resources to research the cure, since all your scientists will be in the bellies of the walkers! :D

If you and your region decide to embrace your inner zombies:

A. Starting early remains critical. Be aware, though, that Zombies naturally die from the infection eventually.
B. Since the game is biased in favour of Zombies, a region that willingly embraces Zombieism will become totally infected rather quickly. Note that even when you reduce a nation's living population to 0, living people will spring out of the thin air at the updates.
C. You should play with 2-4 nations, too, each on a separate browser. Particularly once you leave your home region to spread the Zombie love, you will want to be able to respond disproportionately if some fool fires a Cure Missile at you. Show them no mercy!
D. When possible, you should case the region you want to infect to find the largest nations. Your first ravenous horde or two will create many more Zombies than they would in a smaller nation.
E. Especially when you're raining on the party of some do-gooder region, work quickly, as you will probably be ejected once the populace realizes your mission unless you've gone to a Founderless region with no WA Delegate. Suckers!
F. The feeders and sinkers tend to become blood baths, as do larger regions without a survival plan. Since the mega-large feeders can have massive losses and still make a showing on the "Most Survivors" board, give them payback for not allowing adspam on their RMBs anymore!
G. Be aware of what your prey is doing or not doing. If they are also spreading Zombies, leave them alone unless you want to send them a bloody valentine, so to speak. Inactive nations should be your favoured prey.
H. Should a group of undead bigots totally cure you, you will continue to make more Zombies and you can always ask a Zombie patriot to re-infect you, too.
I. Should you decide to call it a night early, be sure you're joining the Zombies and in a Zombiephilic region when you log out. There's nothing worse than seeing a string of Cure Missiles have been fired at you all night while you slept the Sleep of the (Un)Dead. ;)
J. You CAN research two or all three paths. Since the primary score is the number of living, uninfected citizens, sending in a band of death squads to kill Zombies may be a more effective strategy at lowering a region's score, since the Really Dead cannot be cured.

Remember, this is a game, so have fun playing with the Zombies! Note that once the crisis is over, there will be no permanent effects on your nation--everyone will return to their complete populations, no more Zombies, etc.

We hope you've enjoyed our eleventh issue of Hell's Bells. Nations interested in contributing to future issues should contact The Stalker for details.

Important Note: In payment for having enjoyed our Newspaper you are expected to up arrow this factbook. Failing to up arrow this factbook means you are willing choosing to forfeit ownership of your soul to The Stalker for all eternity instead. Thanks for reading.