by Max Barry

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by The Great Blue Federation of Lemsrow. . 29 reads.


[size=90]Established since 1927! [tab=310]Weather today: A sunny day, recommended to head to the beach for some fun![/size][/tab]

[size=85]Date: July 21, 2021
Vol. I[/size]

[align=center][b][i]THE LARSHAVINK CHRONICLE[/i][/b][/align]


[align=center][b]Larshavink, Wednesday, July 21, 2021 : [i]Covering the entire Larshavink Metropolitan Area! : 1 Page : 10 Cents A Letter![/i][/align][/b]

[size=200] A Murder in Larshavink! Possibility Of Religious Sacrifice? [/size]

In July 10 in nighttime, at 09:53 PM. A caller called 911 to report some commotion. A few minutes into the call, the commotion stopped. The caller asked to send a police officer to check the room. At 10:02 PM, an officer goes inside the building and investigates Room 183. And at 10:04 PM, he enters a room. A bloody room shocks him, and requests an ambulance as blood is spilled everywhere. A knife on the floor next to the bed, broken glass, toppled chairs. Definitely a sign of struggle, but that was the start.

In the bathroom, the police officer finds the victim of the murder. Laureate Pronce, a 45 year old cashier at the West Ronfidshire General Store. 4 kilometers from the apartment, soon at 10:10 PM. An ambulance comes wailing with it’s sirens. Paramedics rush to Room 183, where they see the gruesome scene. At 10:15 PM, Laureate Pronce was pronounced dead, and 2 police officers showed up as they checked on Officer Lopoer since he responded “Oh my god.” As he ignored the operators who said “Officer Lopoer, are you there? I repeat, are you there?”

The 2 officers were horrified of the scene, and by 6:12 AM. The LPSD released a public report to LNBS, and by 9:00 AM. It was all over the news as Laureate’s death spread like a plague, it  was up to the DIAOL (Detective Investigation Association Of Lemsrow) to find out the murderer. The afternoon after the murderer, detectives were looking everywhere at the crime scene. At 7:12 PM, a possible breakthrough. A receipt was found under a lamp, which was the purchase of the knife found at the crime scene. The purchase was made at SM North Larshavink in the district of Edsa, which is 24 kilometers away from the apartment in East Ronfidshire.

On July 13. The LPSD interrogated the keyboy, the manager, the receptionist, and the victim’s family. 2 hours into the interrogation, the receptionist and manager was cleared as both of them were seen at local restaurants throughout East Ronfordshire. The keyboy was interrogated further since his conflicting alibi, but was cleared due to his sighting in nearby district Psolomy.
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The Crime Scene of Room 183, the day after the murder.


A kitchen knife from SM North Larshavink used to kill Laureate Pronce.


Then 3 hours in, they interrogated the family starting with the victim’s aunt. She was interrogated further more than the keyboy due to her being on vacation in a hotel in East Ronfordshire. But eventually cleared, then it moved on to the victim’s uncle, he was cleared fast due to being on vacation in Batorfold. Then it moved on to the mother, she was cleared as she was with aforementioned uncle. And then it moved on to the father.

The father is heavily religious, and restricted her of most things at a young age, he was interrogated even further than the aunt. His alibi was all over the place, when he said he was in the West Ronfordshire Hotel the day before, the interrogator became very suspicious as he checked in the day before the murder.

The father alibi was half unreadable but seemed to say that he was in the West Ronfordshire General Store to buy a kitchen knife as his room contained none. Then in the afternoon, he was laying on his bed watching [i]Godzilla : Resurgence[/i] on his phone. At night, he then travelled to a bar in West Ronfordshire. But the interrogator knew the area well since he was a child and knows the bars are only in the East of Ronfordshire. He pressed further saying that West Ronfordshire had a prohibition of alcoholic beverage since 1983.

The suspected father was arrested for the murder of his daughter, until the court hearing which would come to light on July 20. The defense Spolyak Orleb, who’s won multiple cases over murder cases successfully defending is clients, claimed that the father went insane after one of the movies he watched on his phone.

The prosecutor, Miles Winnipeg claimed that the evidence is already overwhelmingly pointing to the father for his religious background and could back it up with evidence. The Court of Central Larshavink was loud as the defense and prosecutor shouted over the possibilities, evidence and many topics. Eventually, the father broke down and confessed he killed his only daughter. On basis that she disrespected his rules of abstaining from sexual intercourse until the age of 21.

The father was sentenced to death row and be executed after 24 hours. Today, his execution starts 8:00 PM on live for everyone to watch. And as we speak, it’s already 5:30 PM. And we will never forgive the monstrous act of the victim’s father. And may he never arise to heaven for his horrendous actions. And God Bless Laureate Pronce.

[spoiler=Fun Fact][size=150][i]Did you know that parents/people with a religious background involved in a murder will be suspected more due to their sacrifice of their child because of disobedience in Lemsrow?[/i][/size]

[size=10] Disclaimer: This fact does not apply to the real world, this is only a fictional fact made for Lemsrow’s ever growing Federation. [/size] [/spoiler]

[size=200] New Town in Southern Lemsrow Officially Crowned As Most Confusing Town Name In The Nation![/size]

Today, a town in the province of Clarkendale named “Llanfairqwillogerlopinianquartoclariciananada“ has been officially crowned as Most Confusing Town Name In Lemsrow” by The Independent Polls and Sciences. As they interviewed 20,000 tourists, according to TIPS. 19,853 people couldn’t pronounce Llanfairqwillogerlopinianquartoclariciananada correctly as a few could barely pronounce half the town name.

Last night, TIPS interviewed 20,000 natives and all of them could pronounce the town name correctly, albeit with a few tries. Tourists are advised by tour guides to shorten it to Llanfairqwillo. The regional government of Clarkendale has announced that they’ll be keeping the name, even promoting it as one of their tourist destinations as it has a rainforest and a waterfall.

Tourists are flocking to see the beauty of what this monstrously long-named town name really shows. Although the local police are controlling the amount of tourists, hundreds of thousands of tourists are flocking to Southern Lemsrow for the beautiful rainforest and waterfall. Infrastructure for the paths on the rainforest and waterfall as hastily being built with high-quality material to prevent any damage of nature, while adding trash cans along the way.

A hotel company is willing to pay for the construction of a layover for tourists as the journey is 51 kilometers long, not to mention rains. So they’ll pay for the restaurants, local souvenir shops, a viewing deck and the 51 kilometer journey. If you are at ordinary walking speeds, it’d take 6 hours to reach the waterfall. And luckily, there’s a bike service to speed up the journey. You can rent a bike for 50 Pecratian Illocos and ride on the provided bike path. While there is still a walk path for those who challenge themselves to walk the whole way. 

[box][img][/img] The map of Chinikerokinkai National Park. And the cities around it’s perimeter.[/box]