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Dispatch → Bulletin → News
by 
The Dominion of Chacapoya.
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11 reads.
IN CASE OF UNSTOPPABLE ZOMBIE OUTBREAK
It's that time again folkens.
The sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, and hordes of the undead will soon rise from the ground, hellbent on the destruction of the world. They are an imminent threat, and one that must be dealt with.
While it is true that zombies crave the flesh of the living, they also represent an opportunity for the greenest possible Refugia yet. Tell me, when was the last time you saw a zombie litter, hmm? Or drive a car? Operate a coal mine, dig for oil, hunt whales? The truth is, zombies are much better for the environment than we are! With an all-zombie populace, we could wipe carbon emissions down to levels not seen in Refugia since it was founded. Frankly, it would be irresponsible not to join with the zombie hordes and spread the ecofriendliness. That is why I am asking you, citizens of Refugia, to join in the brave new world that we are soon to face, and to meet it with a smile and outstretched arms.The sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, and hordes of the undead will soon rise from the ground, hellbent on the destruction of the world. They are an imminent threat, and one that must be dealt with.
Or are they?
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